


University Discoveries

by Rehfan



Category: Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Irish Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction, Scottish Actor RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bisexual Male Character, Blood, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, F/M, Fights, First Time, Frottage, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Laundry, Library Sex, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Male Slash, Masturbation, Masturbation in Shower, Minor Injuries, More angst, Multi, Mutual Masturbation, Questioning, Rejection, Rimming, Sexual Assault, Sexual Content, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Identity, Sexual Tension, Situational Humiliation, Smut, Snogging, Threesome - F/F/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-20
Updated: 2012-08-30
Packaged: 2017-11-12 13:20:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 28,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/491481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rehfan/pseuds/Rehfan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>College/University AU in which Benedict, James, Tom, and Mike are all housemates on campus... But who's to say it couldn't be more?</p><p>Inspired by the brilliant gifset found HERE: http://rehfan.tumblr.com/post/25610456649/timelordy-teganbreann-shercockled-michael</p><p>NOT my gifset originally... but a BRILLIANT idea!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Housemates

“Hey, James, were you wanking in your room last night?” asked Mike as he reached for a teacup from the kitchen cupboard.

“Pfft. No,” James denied, unconvincingly.

“I heard you,” responded Mike and the other two at the table smirked.

“The walls aren’t very thick around here,” offered Tom. 

“I could hardly focus on my studies last night,” said Ben.

“You were moaning really loudly--,” said Mike.

“Would you just shut up about it?” said James. He tried to hide his blushing by ducking further into his book on Chaucer, but the morning light around the breakfast table wasn’t helping. The three other men grinned.

Oh, but Eve was lovely. James could just drown in her chocolate brown eyes. But great God, he couldn’t say something like that in front of Mike. Maybe Tom and Ben would take the piss for a moment, but Mike would be unrelenting. Forget it. They wouldn’t ever understand.

James’s general disgust with Mike found another outlet.

“Can’t you put a shirt on, ever?” James said to Mike.

“And deny you the prime example of what a true masculine body should look like, you pigeon-chested tosser?” said Mike with an arrogant smirk. “Never happen, mate.”

Tom choked on his coffee and covered it with a laugh. Ben quirked an eyebrow at Tom.

“What?” asked Tom.

“Nothing,” said Ben. He smirked.

Tom glared back at him over his coffee mug.

“What are you two on about then?” said Mike, finally taking his seat at the head of the table. 

“Nothing,” said Ben and Tom simultaneously. 

Tea and toast for Mike’s breakfast as usual. Mike never indulged in jam during rugby season. Too many empty calories, he said. Tom glanced quickly at Mike’s torso as he ate. It was all Tom could do to gain any weight. Mike had to do what he could to keep it off. Ben was slim as well, but Tom had two inches on him and it made Tom look even thinner. James was puny all around, poor sod.

“Well I’m off to the library. Got to study up on my astronomy before Professor Leighton’s exam today,” said Ben as he picked up his cup and plate and placed them in the sink.

“When are you ever NOT in the library?” asked Mike around a bite of toast. “Jesus, are they giving away free blow jobs or something?”

“Who’s week for washing up?” Ben asked, ignoring Mike completely, the crude bastard.

“Tom’s, I think,” said James.

“Like hell,” said Tom. “You traded with me two weeks ago. Remember, James?”

“Oh hell,” said James. “Alright, just leave them there.”

“Laters,” said Ben as he put on his coat and grabbed his books from the adjoining sitting room.

“I’m off too,” said Tom. “I’m so going to fail this history exam… I mean, who cares how many horses died in World War I anyway?” He posed the question as an act of bravado for Mike more than anything. Honestly, he really did think it was awful about all those horses, but he didn’t want to seem too much of a pouf in front of James and Mike. It was bad enough that he wanked off this morning in the shower to the thought of Mike sucking him off. Jesus, he was beautiful.

As soon as Tom left, Mike eyed James. “Going out with her again, mate?” he asked, only half-curious.

“What’s it to you?” James grumbled.

“Jeez,” said Mike getting up and putting his plate and cup in the sink. “See if I take a going interest in your life again then.”

“I’d rather you didn’t,” said James.

Mike came over to him and leaned in closely to James. He could feel Mike’s breath on his ear when he said, “Don’t worry, wanker. I won’t,” and he went upstairs to finish getting dressed for class and the rugby match later that afternoon.

As the front door finally closed behind Mike, James breathed a sigh of relief. If Mike knew what Eve looked like, James knew he wouldn’t have a chance with her. She was a stunning girl: slim, statuesque, perfect. And James knew she had a thing for bad boys. Mike would be just up her alley. Oh no… Mike and Eve could never meet and that was that.

James finished his cereal, did the washing up and raced to class thinking of all the deliciously dirty things he would do to Eve once he and she were alone that night. He couldn’t wait.


	2. Everybody Hates Mike

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like it says on the tin: Everybody Hates Mike
> 
> He is a bit of an ass.

Tom watched the game from the sidelines, cheering Mike on. He watched Mike dominate the other players as the light drizzle made the pitch muddy and slippery. Mike was filthy head to toe already and it was only just past the half. Tom watched as he made a break from the line-out and ran with the ball. Jesus, he was all power, that one.

Mike’s strong legs pushed through the mud past the opposing team’s players as one after another fell in their attempts to catch him. He reached the goal line before anyone else could catch up. Score five for the home team. Tom cheered like mad with the crowd.

The entire game went their way. Mike scored two more in the last half of the game because the opposition couldn’t hold a candle to them in a maul or a ruck. Technically, if the other team hadn’t shown up at all, it would have gone better for them. At least then they wouldn’t have had so many injured players. Mike and his ruggers took no prisoners.

Tom wasn’t so much a violent sports watcher as he was a Mike-watcher. Tall, with broad shoulders and a deep chest, Mike was certainly the epitome of what a man should be physically. He made all the housemates look like pigeon-chested tossers, if Tom was honest. Mike caught Tom’s eye and gave him a toothy grin and a wave from the pitch as the last whistle blew. The score was 42 to 3. Mike looked good crowned in glorious victory. Fucking gorgeous, in fact.

~080~

“Right boys! Clean up the wounds, shower and change. We’ve got beer to drink and women to fuck tonight!” cried Mike. A general shout of approval went up in the locker room. “Everyone at my place at seven! Kegs are to be emptied, women are to be screwed!”

Tom watched Mike make this announcement from the door of the locker room as Mike exited. “What are you doing?” he asked, concerned.

“What does it look like I’m doing? I’m celebrating a victory!” said Mike as he grinned wolfishly at Tom and put a brotherly arm around his shoulders. He steered Tom down the corridor toward the campus and said, “Aren’t you happy we won?”

“You didn’t win,” said Tom. “You conquered.”

“Fuck yes!” exclaimed Mike, yelling right into Tom’s ear. “You’re goddamn right we did. I need a fucking drink.” They stepped out into the drizzle. He looked at Tom with a grin of glee still on his face and said, “You, my friend, are going to get drunk with me. And then we are both going to get laid!”

Tom looked askance at Mike and let a bemused smile grace his features. Tom preferred to get laid sober, but Mike had never had his arm about his shoulders before and Tom felt a bit swept away with the moment. He smiled his widest grin at Mike and let out a yelp of victory that the whole campus could hear.

Tonight was going to be stellar!

 

~080~

 

“You know,” Tom yelled above the crowd and the stereo,” You really should have asked the others about throwing a party before you actually threw said party.”

“Oh, fuck that,” said Mike as he guzzled down his fifth beer and reached for a sixth. “If those fuckers cared a damn about rugby they’d be here already getting drunk and saying hello to… Alice! Hey! Alice! Looking good, sweetheart!” A blonde with legs up to her neck waved coyly in Mike’s direction.

Tom was amazed that such a… well, let’s be honest… a Neanderthal like a drunken Mike could have such pull with the ladies. Mike gave her that wolfish grin and she giggled. Mike stepped away to approach Alice, but before he left Tom’s side he said, “Go find yourself a guy, mate. There’s plenty in the house tonight that swing your way. Let loose. Have fun. Don’t worry about the other guys. It’ll be fine. Ben’s at the library until two, James is sticking it to that chick he's been seeing. It’ll be fine.” And he disappeared across the room with the coy blonde.

It was no secret that Tom was gay. All the guys in the house didn’t give a damn. As Mike told him on day one: ‘Whatever you do with your dick and your ass is no one’s business but yours, mate. Just glove up.’ Tom laughed with relief at that. You never could tell with the sporty type of bloke how they would stand on the subject. Perhaps it was then that Tom developed a little crush on Mike. After all, if the guy didn’t mind him being gay, he couldn’t blame him if Tom stole a glance at him every once in a while.

Tom headed upstairs to check on the bedrooms. The other blokes weren’t home which meant that their things had to be monitored. You never knew who had sticky fingers these days. Shit, even the girls nicked stuff.

James’s room was clear, Ben’s too. Tom’s had a couple snogging on his bed and he kicked them out. Mike’s room was unoccupied and he offered the couple his bed. They gladly accepted. Hell, it was Mike’s idea to throw the party. If his shit got nicked it would be his own fault. Tom sat at the top of the stairs and watched the crowd.

Three hours and a beer later, Tom was still checking on the rooms every twenty minutes. It was nearly two and Ben would be home soon. He’d shit if he found his sheets wrinkled. Still no one in there. But there was someone in James’s. He had just evacuated the room when Mike came ambling on up to him. “I need a favor, mate,” he said. He swayed on his feet and Tom could tell that it wouldn’t be long before he passed out completely.

“What is it?” Tom asked.

“Come ‘ere,” said Mike and he gestured drunkenly with a crooked finger and led the way to the kitchen. “In ‘ere,” he said as he opened the door to the pantry cupboard. The cupboard was just roomy enough for two grown men to be shut up inside it. And that’s just what happened.

Mike closed the door behind him and turned to Tom. “What the hell—,” Tom started to say. Mike covered his mouth with his own and began thrusting his tongue down Tom’s throat. It was aggressive. Way more aggressive than Tom was used to and he grabbed Mike’s face and pulled it back enough to talk. “What are you doing?”

“Well shit... I’ve never kissed a bloke before, but I was pretty sure I was doin’ it right,” Mike said with a sloppy grin on his face.

“Why are you kissing me?” said Tom, totally confused.

“Because,” Mike said and his face went gravely serious, “I trust you.”

Tom looked at him for a moment and thought: What the hell… Tom tilted his head and gently kissed Mike on the mouth, holding onto his head to control the kiss. It worked. Mike followed Tom’s lead and gently probed his mouth with his tongue, letting his tongue slide along Tom’s tongue. God, what the hell is this? So fucking good… Why haven’t I done this before? Oh yeah… I was sober before. Heh.

Tom was filled with such passion. Here was a dream realized. Finally feeling those strong arms about him, gripping him tightly, it was hard for Tom not to have an erection just from the feel of the man’s mouth on his. The taste of him was beer, cigarettes, and something that was all Michael. Oh God, Mike… yes, yes…. Shit… So amazing… Tom could kiss him for days.

Their hands wandered over each other slowly, caressingly. Tom’s hands carded through Mike’s hair. Mike’s hands wandered up and down Tom’s spine and finally rested on his arse, gripping his cheeks and pushing Tom’s pelvis to him. If Tom was trying to keep his erection a secret, he was failing miserably now.

But then, Tom observed, Mike had an erection too. Oh dear, God… How was this even real?

A bright light and noise interrupted the scene. There was a flash of light. Someone snapped a picture. Mike broke off the kiss and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He winked at Tom and turned to the crowd that had gathered for the big reveal. “Each and every one of you fuckers owes me twenty quid!” he exclaimed.

A knot developed in the pit of Tom’s stomach. Mike had just used him to win a bet. Jesus.

Mike turned to Tom and said, “Thanks, mate.” Mike slapped him on the arm and walked off with Alice who was giggling away at the grand joke.

Tom was crushed.

 

~080~

 

“Holy sweet weeping Jesus,” said Ben. He came home to find that the house looked like a massacre had taken place. What few conscious people there were remaining, Ben told them all to go home – “in a cab, damn you” – and what people that could be roused and ushered out in the same manner, were.

Ben found Tom in his room. “What the hell happened here?”

“Mike’s rugby team happened,” said Tom. He was really not in the mood to talk. After the cupboard incident, he had slunk back upstairs and remained on the second level keeping everyone off the damn floor altogether. After a while, people got the message and didn’t bother to mount the stairs. The party got quieter once Mike had left with Alice. Most of the ruggers took that as their cue to leave as well. The few that remained were most likely too drunk to walk, so Tom just went to bed.

“I take it they won,” said Ben sardonically. 

“Yeah,” said Tom. He stared off into the middle distance curled up on his side. He never looked at Ben.

“What happened?” asked Ben. Tom’s body language screamed that bad news had occurred in his absence. “Where’s Mike now?”

“Gone off with that blonde Alice,” Tom replied flatly. He could still hear her giggling.

Ben came into the room and sat on the edge of Tom’s bed. He reached out and tentatively put a hand on Tom’s knee. Tom jerked his leg. Ben pulled his hand back and said, “What’s wrong with you? Are you sick or something?”

“No,” Tom said, suddenly tired of Ben’s presence in the room, “Just fucking go away, alright? I’m knackered from keeping drunks out of our shit all night. I want to sleep. Is that okay?” Tom looked at Ben with eyes that had managed to well up with tears.

Ben didn’t know what to make of all of this. He got up and with hands raised, backed slowly out of the room. Before he closed the door he said, “Have a good sleep, mate. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Ben didn’t know how to help his friend. Tom seemed really upset about something and Ben had a vague thought to ask one of the remaining drunks downstairs what had gone on, but he really wasn’t up for questioning the inebriated. Especially when he knew it would probably get him nowhere. He went back downstairs and spent an hour passing from room to room picking up cups, cans, napkins and dumping ashtrays. Against his better instincts, he even looked in to see about the downstairs toilet. Yeah… that’d wait until morning. Matter of fact, Mike would clean it. That would be a fair punishment, considering how the place looked… and smelled.

Ben managed to get the last of the drunks out of the house before he went to bed. He thought of looking in on Tom, but decided that he’d be better off just sleeping. Ben went to bed.

He laid there staring at the ceiling knowing that Tom’s bed was just on the other side of the wall behind his headboard. Ben was not as brave as Tom. He could never tell anyone about his homosexuality. Not that he was ashamed, so much, but more that it would somehow be an obligation for him to be with a partner. It was too much trouble. It was too much work. And the dreams of being an astrophysicist were stronger than any orgasm could possibly be.

After almost a year together in this house, he didn’t think any of the guys would be surprised, but it was still a difficult thing to say out loud. Saying it out loud would make it true. And then he would have to do something about it. Like actually date someone. Ugh. Either that, or endure a round of Mike shoving one of the gay rugby players at him. Jesus… no thank you.

But then, Ben thought about how Tom’s blue eyes shone from the tears he wanted to cry. He imagined smoothing away those tears with a thumb and kissing his face. He really did like Tom a great deal, if he was honest. Tom was the peacemaker in the house. He could calm any situation with cool confidence. It was uncanny.

But what do you do when your peacemaker is in trouble? Who can you rely on? Ben wanted Tom to lean on his shoulder. He wanted him to trust in him, to share his problems. And more than anything, right now, Ben wanted Tom to let him kiss him.

Ben imagined their first kiss: gentle, soothing, smoldering. Eventually the kiss would build until they couldn’t stand it anymore. Ben felt himself getting hard with the fantasy. He reached into his pyjama bottoms and pulled out his half-hard dick. He licked his palm for a bit of slickness and slowly stroked himself as he thought of sweet, delicate, hot-as-fuck Tom.

He imagined being skin to skin with him, resting his body weight on top of him and snogging him into oblivion. He imagined how they would both melt into the kiss, their hard cocks rubbing together in Ben’s fist, their tongues echoing the stroking motions of their dicks. Oh dear God, Tom… you feel so fucking good against me… shit.

Ben gripped tighter on his cock and ran a thumb over his slit, smearing the precum over his shaft with every stroke. He teased his head with just his fingertips, his hips grinding up to find more sensation and varied that with hard strokes on his shaft. He imagined it was Tom’s tongue on his head, sucking him off. Jesus, how would that look, then? Golden curls above sky blue eyes looking up at him as Tom hollowed out his cheeks with the suction. Fuck. Oh fuck…. Jesus fuck… Oh god Tom… Oh shit, Tom… that’s it… oh yeah suck me off…. Oh shit…. Ah! Ah!

Ben came as silently as he could, considering the object of his desire was just on the other side of the wall behind him. Cum spurted out in streams on his belly and chest and Ben lay there in the afterglow for a few minutes just catching his breath. After a while, he cleaned himself off with a few tissues and rolled over and went to sleep.

Mike would pay for whatever it was he did to Tom. Just wait until tomorrow, Mike. You’ll get yours, mate.

 

~080~

 

“Oh James… what’s gotten into you?” said Eve. They had come back to her place after the restaurant had kicked them out at midnight. They were just talking and talking and having a wonderful time, but when they got to her place and James found out her housemate was off at a party somewhere, James decided that tonight was the night. She was mid-sentence when he leaned in and kissed her neck.

“Mmm,” he hummed against her throat, “You. You are so damn beautiful, Eve.” He trailed kisses up her neck and along her jawbone to her ear. She was apparently quite sensitive there. She fairly keened with pleasure.

“Oh so good…,” she murmured.

“You should see me when I kiss you properly,” he said. He reached out and took her face in his hands, leaned in and kissed her sweetly on the mouth. It was a chaste kiss, one that didn’t assume too much. He didn’t want to push her too far too fast all at once. But Eve didn’t seem to mind.

She gave as good as she got and better. She opened her mouth and licked his lips. He allowed her control of the kiss and holy God… she was like a wild mare unbridled. Her tongue explored his mouth, caressing against lips, teeth, and tongue in a wild darting dance that had James’s head spinning. She tasted like warm wine, a hint of garlic, and something else… it shot straight to James’s cock.

He carded a hand through her hair, tilting her head and deepening the kiss. James moaned with pleasure. He wrapped an arm around her waist and glided his hands up and down her back, tracing little circles at the base of her spine. She gripped his shirt and clung to him as if he were the only man left on earth. Pure fucking bliss.

“Hey! What’s going on in here, then?”

The two pulled apart, startled by the intrusion. James looked up and couldn’t believe his shit luck. It was Mike. And here was better news: he was drunk.

“I thought you were at a party,” said Eve, clearly a bit embarrassed, but eyeing Mike’s physique all the same.

“I was, silly,” said Alice, “and now I’m home,” as if that explained everything.

James got up from the sofa and grabbed Mike by the arm, pulling him to one side. In an angry whisper he said, “What the hell are you doing here?” The girls were chatting amongst themselves for the moment, sharing their stories for the evening.

“Well,” said Mike, grinning like a loon, “with any luck I’ll be doing that girl right over there,” he pointed at Alice, paused for a moment and then said with another shade of lunatic smile: “And I’ll do your girl too, if you’re willing to share. She’s fucking hot, mate. Congratulations.” He thumped James heavily on his back and James nearly fell over with the impact, but then Mike lost some of his equilibrium and leaned heavily on James. “Woah…,” said Mike, “Sorry about that, mate. Had a bit to drink tonight.”

“No kidding,” said James, clearly irritated.

“Hey everybody,” Mike said to the girls, “my mate here makes a hell of a cup of tea and I know I could use some. Why don’t we three get acquainted while Jimmy here goes and makes us all some tea?”

“I really don’t think--,” began James.

“Ooh,” said Alice, “tea sounds lovely. Would you mind, Jimmy?” James hated being called Jimmy, but somehow he found himself deserting Eve and going into the kitchen to prepare the drink. Minutes later, he couldn’t find the creamer and went looking for Alice or Eve to help him.

All three of them had scarpered. The sitting room was empty. Noises came from upstairs: giggles, footsteps, the creak of a bed.

No. It can’t be.

Mike wouldn’t dare. Would he?

Two distinct female voices came down to his disbelieving ears.

Son of a bitch.

James slammed the door on his way out.

Fucking son of a bitch.


	3. Awakenings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone gets a wake-up call. Not everyone is happy about this.

Mike left the girls’ house before either of them could wake. This sort of thing was pretty routine for him throughout his time in school and Uni was no different. He’d even developed a ‘patented’ technique for extricating himself from beneath limbs, dressing in the dark, dressing in small enclosed spaces, sneaking down squeaky staircases and shutting creaking doors with barely a whisper. In other words, he was a god among men.

The sun was just up as he ambled down the street putting on his shirt as he went. Shirt was always last, he’d advised other blokes. Always. Don’t bother putting it on until you know you’re safely away. It’s just easier.

The pounding in his head was another matter. The sun was just hitting his face and it was like God’s torchlight. As he came up the street to the house, he wondered how Tom fared last night. Poor bugger looked shocked as shit when he pulled away from that kiss. And Jesus wept, what a kiss! Tom really knew what he was doing. Come to think on it… Mike didn’t mind that much either. Funny that.

His memory of exactly what transpired was sketchy at best, but he did remember having a really good time… and shagging two gorgeous girls… and… oh shit… and one of them was James’s lass… shit shit and shit. Mike paused before the front door, his hand on the handle. How was he ever going to make this up to the tosser?

Mike didn’t hate James. In fact, he quite liked the guy. He thought himself a sort of big-brother, a mentor, yeah that’s it… He was a mentor to James. Hell, he could make it up to him next weekend. He’d take James out to a bar and they’d pull a few birds and go home and get naked. He’d get over it.

More confident because of his fool-proof plans, Mike went into the house and headed toward the kitchen for some coffee. Unfortunately, this morning his regular kitchen had been replaced with a lion’s den.

“Well, well, well…,” began Ben, “look who finally turned up.” He suddenly shouted at Mike, “And how are you this morning, you git?!”

“Jesus on the cross!” said Mike, taking a step back at the verbal attack and covering his ears. “What the hell are you doing, mate? Trying to kill me?”

“No…,” said James, “death’s too good for you.” He glared at Mike over his tea cup. In fact, they all glared.

“Alright, alright,” Mike said as he slowly took a seat at the table. “I’ve been a right bastard to you, James – but I have a plan! See, what we’ll do is, next weekend--,”

“Shut it, mate,” said James, his voice like venom. “You don’t get to talk here. WE get to talk. Us three. You've been a right bastard to Tom too, from what I've heard." With this, he turned to Tom and said, "Ben told me.”

Tom, who had been watching this whole confrontation silently, looked from James to Ben. He shot Ben a look of curious hurt. Ben shrugged and said: “You were upset, mate. Mike had done something. I don’t know what because you never told me, but I assumed you’d have a bone to pick with him this morning because of it. James was pretty pissed off when I came downstairs this morning. I thought you two could shout at him together.”

Tom glanced down at the table and said softly, “I don’t want to talk about it... Whatever you fellows decide, I’ll be fine with it.”

Mike opened his mouth to protest, but was quickly shut up by Ben who pointed an accusatory finger at him and declared: “Don’t even dream about talking your way out of this. For starters, you’re going to clean the downstairs toilet…” Here, Mike began to protest. Ben cut him off again, “…AND you’re going to do the washing up for the rest of James’s week – PLUS your week.”

“And there’s a little matter of ‘throwing parties’ to discuss,” said James. “From now on, if any one of us doesn’t get a two-thirds majority on agreeing to have a party, that person will do the washing up for everyone for a month, to include cleaning the house as well: hoovering, toilets, showers. All of it.”

Mike’s shoulders slumped. There was a pause in the conversation and he took his opportunity. “Do I get to say anything here?” said Mike.

“No!” said James and Ben in unison.

“Fellows… please,” said Tom softly.

“And what do you care anyway?” Mike said to Ben. “I didn’t do shit to you. Why are you defending Tom all of a sudden?”

Ben blushed a bit, but recovered quickly. “He’s my housemate. And you didn’t see him last night after you left with that blonde.”

“Ben, stop… please,” said Tom. He looked fatigued with the constant attacking going on. He seemed to shrink in his chair. Ben had never seen him look so wounded. It made him want to punch Mike right in the mouth.

Mike felt the mood in the room needed changing and, despite his hangover’s urgings to get some coffee and aspirin and head to bed, he stood up from his chair and said: “Alright, so I do the chores for everyone for a month as payback.” Ben started to say something to him, but Mike cut him off: “– starting with the loo,” and headed off to the cupboard that had the cleaning supplies.

As soon as he left the room, Ben said, “Right, that’s sorted.” He glanced at his watch. “I’m due at a study group in fifteen minutes. Are you fellows alright?”

“We will be,” said James glumly.

 

~080~

 

Tom was not as regular a visitor to the library as Ben, but he did spend his fair share among the stacks of books. He loved the way books smelled: sort of a vanilla and must combination. He had finished with his morning classes and had a three hour break so he wandered in. The Uni they attended had the most impressive library. Three levels high, it stretched out in a gigantic cross pattern. The walls were lined with shelves that ran from the floor to the ceiling upon whose ends one could clearly read the labels for the Dewey decimal system. Rows of computers that served as the card catalogue sat on tables on the first level, close to the entrance. Tom walked past these, knowing that the chemistry books were off to the right and up on the third level. He took the lift to the landing and walked past row upon row of bookshelves, solidly built, made to last for a lifetime of education.

They had replaced the carpets on the second and third levels during session break and Tom’s feet moved noiselessly across the aisles. There were long tables interspersed between certain aisles so that one didn’t have to carry the tomes to the ends of the earth in order to study. It was near the back wall of the chemistry section that Tom found Ben studying alone.

He was lost in concentration over a book that contained what appeared to be hieroglyphics. Upon closer inspection, he saw that it was just a complicated maths equation. To Tom, they amounted to the same thing.

He didn’t want to startle Ben, but it happened anyway. He sat in the chair next to him, Ben’s arm blocking his view as he leaned on his elbow and propped up his head with his hand. Tom whispered, “Hey,” gently and tapped on his arm. Ben jumped a mile.

“Sorry,” said Tom and stifled a hearty chuckle. “I’m so so sorry!” 

Ben breathed a sigh of relief and smiled at him. “What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean, ‘what am I doing here’? I’m a student here too, you know,” said Tom, teasing him. “This isn’t your own personal private… mind palace.”

“’Mind palace’?” said Ben. “What the fuck is a ‘mind palace’?” The two men laughed as quietly as they could.

“I don’t know,” said Tom through his laughter. “I was just making shit up.”

“Well from now on, that’s exactly what this place will be to me: my own personal private Mind Palace,” said Ben, grinning from ear to ear. “Make your appointments to see me at the card catalogue on the ground floor.”

Tom laughed quietly again at this. “Thanks for that, mate. I needed to laugh,” he said.

Ben became serious at this admission. He said, “What happened last night, Tom? Please tell me. You were really… It kind of… It was weird.”

“Oh…,” said Tom, suddenly interested in that book he came to the library for. He looked around the stacks of books and got up to go to the section. He walked away from Ben a few paces and turned back to him. “It was just Mike being Mike… selfish git,” he said with a shrug.

Ben got up and followed Tom down the aisle. It happened to be one of the more poorly constructed aisles. The stacks were so close together that there was really only room for one person at a time. In order to let someone pass you, you had to press yourself up against the heavy wooden shelves. And even then, the other person would still brush across you. No one ever came up to the chemistry section, so the library never saw fit to re-fit the space.

Tom looked over the shelves to find what he had come in for. He knew the book well. This would be the fourth time he was checking it out of the library. God, he hated Chemistry.

He was bent over slightly when Ben caught up with him. It was tough to see book spines in an aisle that close. He tapped Tom on his shoulder. Tom stood and faced Ben. He was two inches taller than Ben but Ben’s curly ginger hair almost matched Tom’s golden curls. They both had gorgeous blue eyes, pale skin, and high cheekbones. They could have been brothers.

What light that came from the lamps above shone soft on their faces as they looked at one another. After a moment, Ben said softly, “Tell me.”

Tom hesitated only a moment before relating the story to Ben, leaving nothing out. He even told Ben about Mike’s erection. At the story’s end, Tom had a sadness in his eyes that hit Ben’s heart like a hammer.

“I’m so sorry, Tom,” said Ben. A tear made its way down Tom’s cheek and Ben couldn’t help himself. He brushed it away with his finger tip and stroked Tom’s face with his hand.

Tom stood fascinated by such a tender touch. He had no idea how deeply Ben felt for him. He had no idea until that moment… well, perhaps he had suspected… but Ben never… Tom looked into Ben’s eyes and saw his love. It was just a glimpse, but it was enough. Tom’s eyes drifted to Ben’s mouth… Jesus God… so beautiful.

Ben absorbed Tom’s face, memorizing every feature, every freckle, his hand still caressing the side of his face, now tracing over his ear. He saw Tom looking at his mouth and wetting his lips. Heat spread to Ben’s cock as his throat went dry. Tom’s mouth was right there, lips still wet from his tongue… and oh that tongue. What did Tom taste like?

Ben leaned in and kissed Tom gingerly. Tom tilted his head, gripped Ben’s hips, and allowed Ben to hold his head with one hand and wrap his arm around his shoulders with the other. Oh sweet Jesus… Ben tasted so damn good… tea… and something akin to wine… Tom licked those amazing lips and Ben opened his mouth to let Tom have a deep taste.

Tom explored Ben’s mouth with his tongue, his senses reeling with all the new information… velvet… soft… warm… wet… stubble… heat… Oh God… so fucking good… 

Tom brought their hips in close contact and rubbed his erection against Ben. He could feel Ben’s hardness through his jeans and moved his hands to caress Ben’s arse. My God, how did I not notice that Ben had the most amazing arse?! He squeezed and massaged Ben’s arse, slowly tongue-fucking his mouth and grinding their erections together. Son of a bitch… such fucking perfection.

Ben felt himself get hard the moment Tom’s tongue slid against his. For a moment, he thought his knees were going to buckle, but Tom gripped his hips with surprisingly strong hands and well… Ben couldn’t help himself. He carded a hand through Tom’s curls and gripped the back of his head to deepen the kiss. Too incredible… so soft… and wet… and warm… and Jesus fuck! Was that Tom’s erection pressing against his? Oh sweet Lord… Ben ran a hand down one of Tom’s arms just as Tom was moving his hands to Ben’s arse. More… more… Oh dear God, Tom… I want this… so much… UNG! Ben let out a grunt when Tom squeezed his arse and ground against him in an undeniable rhythm that chanted over and over: ‘I want you I want you I want you…’

Suddenly, it was too much for Ben. The library, the books, the smell, the kiss, the hard cock against his, the hands on his backside…. It was more than Ben was prepared for. It was more than he had experienced before. He knew he was gay. But he was also a virgin in a lot of respects – including the biggest respect. It was more than a bit humiliating. Tom couldn’t know. Tom couldn’t ever ever know. Panic rose in Ben.

He had to end this. He had to.

Ben broke the kiss and the embrace. “I- I- I really have to go,” he said to Tom and he immediately turned and practically ran up the aisle the way he had come. Tom followed him.

“Hey!” Tom said with a loud whisper. He watched Ben frantically pack up his things. “Hey!” he said again and put a hand on Ben’s arm. “What’s going on? Was it too much? Are you okay?”

“No,” said Ben, not wanting to hurt Tom’s feelings any more than they already had been at the hands of Mike. “Really, it’s nothing you did. I… just remembered that I have a class.” And with that, Ben left Tom in the library standing with his mouth open and a very confused look on his face.

 

~080~

 

The day was filled with all kinds of chores around the house and Mike was the only one doing them. He could have been resentful. He could have been downright spiteful. But in the end what he was was tired. He lay in bed that night, his back aching from scrubbing the downstairs toilet, doing the washing up, running the laundry, making the beds, hoovering the floors, and washing up the upstairs loo as well.

He might be a prick to his friends, but he damn sure knew how to take his punishment.

And it was all justified. He never meant to hurt anyone, but he certainly wasn’t thinking about anyone else but himself yesterday. And poor Tom… what the fuck was that anyway? He’d be pissed if he found out that he were the butt of a bet. And Tom never did anything to anyone. He was a good, stand-up-for-you, kind of bloke. He didn’t ask for all that.

And Mike had to admit: kissing Tom was kind of nice. Actually, it was kind of hot. A closed space, close proximity, nowhere to run, two bodies pressed against each other in the dark, and the two of their cocks touching… Jesus… Mike never saw himself liking that sort of thing. On paper it sounded disgusting, but for it to happen. Just… happen... Well… that was a horse of a different color.

Sure, chicks were softer and more rounded in all the right places, but a guy is a whole different thing. He’s more unforgiving, more primal, more aggressive – even when he’s not being aggressive. It changes the dynamic completely. It appealed to Mike’s sense of competition and his ferocity for challenges. He really liked it.

What the hell did that mean?

Mike felt his back twinge as he turned in bed from lying on his side to his back, a reminder of what his other crime was.

And then there was James. Jesus, he really screwed him over. He cock-blocked him and then stole his woman. Who does that to a guy he calls a friend? Mike felt guilt gnaw at him. He had to make it up to James in another way. He had to say he was sorry. He pictured himself hugging James tightly, then pulling him away and holding his attention by holding either side of his head. And then his imagination took it a step further… he imagined kissing James.

What the holy hell was that?

Mike sat up suddenly and his back protested, but he shoved the pain aside and thought about James and that kiss. He realized that he was half-hard at the thought. So… his brain and his prick were out to betray him. Nice one.

But I’m straight. I’m fucking straight. I’ve proven that time and time again with fucking hundreds of women. What the hell am I getting hard over a guy for? It makes no fucking sense.

Mike lay back down and pulled his prick out. He gave himself a few strokes and pictured Eve and Alice licking his dick. Oh yeah… that worked… The two women flanked him on either side, tongues out and ready to lick up his shaft. Suddenly, they disappeared and James was going down on him.

Mike felt his cock twitch and heat spread to his groin at the thought. It was so bizarre to have this thought in his head. It was wrong… but it was only a fantasy. One fantasy couldn’t mean he was gay. Could it?

His neglected cock’s throbbing pulled his focus back to James sucking him off. Mike pictured him kissing the insides of his thighs softly. Unbelievable. Even though he had never had a guy ‘down there’ before, his brain knew that James kisses would have a touch of rough stubble to them. Mike smiled at the thought and continued to pleasure himself.

James kissed closer and closer to Mike’s cock. It was almost torturous. Just suck my dick, already! James smiled at this and huffed hot air on his dick. Mike groaned aloud at the imagined sensation, precum dripping freely from his dick now. He smoothed a thumb over his slit and slicked up his shaft with it.

James was toying with his head now… just little licks around the head and flicking his tongue at Mike’s frenulum. Fuck, that’s good… Oh god yeah… James, you know just what I like, don’t you? Suck my cock… please… just suck my cock… James gave him a grin and took him in in one go, deep-throating his way all the way down.

Fuck! Ah…son of a…. shit!

James’s cheeks hollowed out with the suction on the pull-out and Mike damn near came from the sight. He went down on him again, this time fisting his shaft and keeping his mouth over the head of his cock, working in a steady rhythm meant to build…and build… Mike could see James watching for him to cum… and he wanted to cum. He wanted to cum deep inside James’s mouth, spilling his seed everywhere, watching James swallow it all and lick him clean… Oh dear God… that was it… that was it exactly…

“AH! Damn it! Fuck!” said Mike as he came in thick white ropes over his belly and chest. So good… so fucking good… oh God….

After he cleaned himself off, he fell asleep thinking of how much he would love to make that fantasy come to life… because that was the best orgasm he’d had in ages. But Mike admitted unhappily: James would never go for it.

 

~080~

 

Tom lay awake that night as well. He didn’t hear Mike as they were on opposite ends of the hall and across from each other. What he did hear was when Ben went to bed. The creak and small bang of the headboard had become an everyday sound for him. In a way, it was sort of comforting, knowing that he was so close.

Tom had tried to put Ben out of his mind all day and concentrate on his studies, but it was a lost cause. Between Ben’s eyes, mouth, and that fantastic arse, Tom was half-hard just thinking about him. He imagined what it would be like to see Ben naked.

Once, a few months back, he had seen him in a towel – only just. He was going from the bathroom to his own room just as Tom came up the stairs. Tom remembered seeing Ben’s back and being impressed with his musculature. He was better built that Tom had suspected.

Tom imagined licking the water droplets from Ben’s skin, working his way down his spine, pulling the towel away to reveal that amazing, perfect, firm arse. In an instant, Tom was fully erect.

Tom stroked his cock lazily thinking of which cheek he would kiss, lick, and suck on first. He didn’t suppose it mattered. In this fantasy, he chose the left and used his whole tongue to bathe Ben. Shit… oh my God…

He imagined Ben leaning up against the wall of the corridor as he continued to lick, kiss, suck and caress his arse. Tom moved Ben’s legs further apart and spread his cheeks. He slowly licked Ben’s tight hole, causing Ben to moan with pleasure.

“Oh, Ben,” said Tom to his empty room, “You are so tight. So fucking tight. Don’t worry. I’ll work you open. I’ll take you right up against this wall. And you will come for me.”

Tom tightened his grip on his shaft and began pumping rhythmically, each stroke in time with each thrust of his tongue in Ben’s arsehole. Ben was pushing back against him trying to impale himself on Tom’s probing, wiggling tongue.

“Ooh, patience, love,” he said aloud, but softly so as not to disturb anyone else in the house, “You are an eager one, aren’t you, Ben? Well then…” Tom imagined taking a slicked up finger and pushing it into Ben. Ben backed that perfect arse onto his hand and moaned again, begging for more, always more, and calling out Tom’s name.

Oh dear God… Tom, please… give me more, Tom. I need you… please…

Tom inserted a second and then a third finger, waiting for Ben to adjust to the girth of it. Ben’s eagerness never abated. He just kept keening and begging Tom… More, Tom… please… I need you… inside… now… please… cum inside me…

Well, who was Tom to refuse? Tom stood, aligned his cock with Ben’s arse and pushed his way in achingly slowly, feeling the heat… and the slickness… and the tightness… and oh God damn it was so good… and once completely inside, he waited for Ben to relax again.

“Good boy, Ben,” Tom said aloud, “Almost time for me to fuck you senseless. Are you ready? Yes? Good… Oh so fucking tight… So good, Ben… I knew it would be.”

Tom felt his orgasm crest as he fucked Ben. And didn’t he look amazing? Ben’s face was pressed to the wall, his eyes closed, his mouth open and all sorts of lascivious things were coming out of it: Fuck me, Tom… harder… fuck me…. Take me, Tom… I’m yours… All yours… I’ve wanted you for so long… please, Tom…Fuck me… Tom!

Tom came into his hand and onto his stomach as Ben called out his name. He was too damn beautiful. Too fucking sexy. How in hell did Tom not see him before? How was that even possible?

When Tom drifted off to sleep, he resolved to talk about this with Ben in the morning. Tom couldn’t be happier.

 

~080~

 

“…Ben…”

Ben sat up and turned on his light. He thought he heard his name being called. It sounded like Tom. Ben groaned inwardly. He had successfully managed to avoid Tom ever since they kissed and now the chickens have come home to roost. Resigned to his fate, Ben got up and went to Tom’s door.

Something told Ben to listen at the door before knocking. Perhaps it’s because any time Tom wanted to talk to Ben he usually just came to his room and knocked on his door. This was suspiciously different. He leaned an ear to the wood.

“You are an eager one, aren’t you, Ben? Well then…”

Ben pulled his head away from the door as if it were made of molten lava. What the hell was that? Did Tom know he was standing there? Was he taking the piss? Ben leaned in again and listened.

The unmistakable noises of masturbation reached his ears. Ben blushed and was ready to turn away when he heard Tom say softly, “Good boy, Ben. Almost time for me to fuck you senseless. Are you ready? Yes? Good… Oh! You are so fucking tight… So good, Ben… I knew it would be.”

Ben was hard instantly. Tom wanted him. It was such a turn-on. So frigging hot. But Ben couldn’t go back to his room for a wank. Tom would hear him. It would be too humiliating.

A shower. I need a shower. Right now.

Ben made for the toilet and ran the shower as hot as he could stand it. Discarding his robe and clothes on the floor, he let the hot water beat on his body for a minute, feeling the shooting water create interesting sensations along his prick.

Tom was wanking and thinking about him. Him! Oh… it was too incredible. But if the library incident taught him anything, it was that Tom was a man of great passion.

Instantly, Ben’s mind took him back to that tight, dark, quiet aisle in the library.

This time, they were naked. Tom was kissing him and stroking Ben’s cock in rhythm with his tongue. Ben was following Tom’s lead and doing the same. This fantasy was safe for Ben. He had been here before in real life. He knew what to expect. He knew every sensation. And now there was a new one to add as he felt Tom grab his arse with his free hand.

Oh yes… amazing… fucking amazing… More, Tom… I want to cum for you…. Come on… come on…. Tom’s fist pumped harder on Ben’s hard cock. The books behind both men rocked with their efforts, but the shelves themselves were too solidly built to move. No one knew they were there, but they had to be so quiet. Tom whispered into Ben’s ear: You are so good, Ben... I knew it would be… Jesus… Oh God, Ben…I knew you could fuck me senseless… Only you, Ben… Oh, Ben… only you…

A powerful and sudden wave of orgasm hit Ben in an instant. He saw a bright flash and felt himself cum all over the shower curtain. His knees were shaking. That was the best orgasm of his life.

But reality struck him: Fantasy Tom was impressed by Ben. But Real-Life Tom? What would he think of his inexperience? Oh dear God… I’m better off with my books. Alone.

Alone keeps me safe.

Later, Ben drifted off to sleep not knowing what he was going to do.


	4. Hate, Love... What's the difference?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which confusing things happen to people who don't really know what they want... or how to get it.

No one said a word at breakfast. They each prepared their own meals, ate in silence, and departed the house bound for their own destinations. Tom wanted to talk to Ben, but not in front of the others. James wanted to confront Eve regarding her behavior the other night and was busy formulating what he would say to her in his head as he knew he was going to see her in class that morning. Ben and Mike just felt ashamed. It was best that silence reigned.

 

~080~

 

“What the hell was that about the other night?” James asked Eve angrily. They stood just outside the doors of the Science building in the shadow of that grand gothic doorway. People passed them as they stood there, not glancing at them, but moving around them as though they were a rock in a stream.

“Not here!” Eve whispered loudly, alarmed.

“Yes, here,” said James. “You owe me an explanation. What the hell was that? We see each other for weeks and you ditch me for a guy you glanced at once? And my housemate to boot! What the hell?”

“Mike said you’d be like this,” Eve pouted. James couldn’t disguise his shock.

“What?!” he exclaimed, his voice echoing off the marble façade.

“Shh!” Eve cautioned. “Not so damn loud.” She walked past him down the stone stairs and strode across the school grounds as quickly as she could. Anywhere away from other’s ears was fine with her. That night was embarrassing for her. James was so sweet, but Mike… well. He could charm the birds from the trees. And he was much better looking than James, but Eve could never tell James that.

“Why should I be quiet?” he shouted back at her. James was mad as hell and he didn’t care who knew that the one-time girl of his dreams, whom he had tried so desperately to be a gentleman to, turned out to be… well… easy. “You and your housemate double-teamed my housemate after you had only known him for, what? Minutes?! Why should I care about what people think of you?”

Once they were alone on a footpath that led to her house, she turned to him suddenly and said, “Stop it! Just… stop.” She began to cry.

For the second time, James was shocked. “Why are you crying?”

“Because… what happened…,” she began, “it wasn’t… I didn’t think… Oh, what’s the use?” She turned from him, her cheeks wet with tears.

James was moved by her breakdown and began to get very suspicious as to what happened between Mike, Eve, and Alice that night. “Did he… force you to do anything?” he asked softly.

“No,” she said miserably, “No, it was fine. I’m just humiliated. That’s all. I can’t believe I just jumped into bed with someone I barely knew. I’m so sorry, James. You didn’t deserve that.”

“Yeah,” said James, “well… I suppose you know this means that I really don’t want to see you again.” He felt badly about breaking it off with her at this point. She seemed genuinely upset at her actions. But James couldn’t bring himself to date a woman that Mike had sullied. The thought of his smug grin if he ever brought her to the house… Ugh. No. No thank you.

“Yeah,” she admitted quietly, “I’m sorry I blew it. You were really nice to me, James. I’m so sorry. And I don’t blame you for not wanting to see me. I get it.”

“So this is goodbye then,” he said. “Good luck with your studies for the year. I’ll see you around.” He turned away from her back up the path.

“Yeah,” she said, the tears coming back to her eyes. “Goodbye, James.”

 

~080~

 

James made his way back up the footpath and thought of Eve’s tears. She was really upset at her own actions, but Mike was partially – if not mostly – to blame for what happened. Somehow cleaning the toilets for a month didn’t seem like enough punishment. For what Mike put him through, for what he put Eve through, he should be punished way more severely than that.

James paused mid-stride and thought about where Mike should be right now. He had morning classes in order to provide for rugby practice in the afternoon. It was just noon now. James went to the rugby pitch.

He sat on the stands for two hours waiting for practice to start. As he sat, he stewed about Mike. During his ruminations, he came up with about thirty more reasons to lay into the guy. Somehow Mike always managed to humiliate James, belittle him. Party after party they’d attend and there Mike would be, drunk off his arse and singing football songs, all the while with his arm wrapped around the object of James’s affections. Of course, he usually hadn’t made a move to claim the girl, so even she didn’t know James was interested in her, but still… it was weird how they had the same taste in women.

Mike would interrupt James when he knew he was trying to study for a test or write a paper. It was a very bad habit that James couldn’t seem to cure him of. What was the point of it anyway? To get James to fail? Why? It made no fucking sense.

And then there were the practical jokes. Everyone played one on each other in the house at some point, but it seemed that James had a target on his back when it came to Mike’s jokes. James pissed his bed more than once because his hand got dipped in a bowl of water while he slept. Once he wiped his face in the morning to find his hand full of shaving foam or his face coated in toothpaste. And then there was the wonderful day he woke up and found permanent marker all over his forehead, the word TOSSER staring out at him from the mirror in thick black letters. James had to wear a hat for two weeks until he finally had it all washed off.

Voices came up from below him. The team was arriving. James easily picked Mike out of the crowd. His athleticism set him apart. The others were either stockier, taller and thinner, or just looked like they were still growing into their bodies. Mike looked like he belonged there: a warrior about to go into battle.

It was a two hour practice with little to no breaks and James kicked himself for not snatching a moment with Mike beforehand. But then, James wasn’t too sure what he was going to say to Mike. All the while he sat and brooded on his bad timing, Mike’s arrogance smiled up at him from the pitch. It was in the way he moved, stood, tackled, dodged, and generally powered his way through the rucks and mauls and all the other drills. It made James seethe with jealousy that he wasn’t built like that. Shit, if he was, he knew he wouldn’t be half as arrogant about it.

Mike waved at him from the pitch after a particularly hard tackle. He was all smiles. Like a feral cat with his mouth full of rat guts. James hated him.

Practice over, the ruggers hit the showers. James stood by the outer door to the athletics building waiting for him. He was angry, properly angry. He looked up at every footstep, at every voice, even though he knew they didn’t belong to Mike; he was champing at the bit to tell that fucker what he thought of him. Finally that arrogant twat came around the corner and James couldn’t help himself. 

James punched Mike right in the eye. Hard.

Shocked, Mike went down as James leapt on top of him, hunching over and pummeling him with both fists. Mike curled up in a ball to protect himself and swung blindly at his attacker. His fist connected with the side of James’s ribcage and James lost his balance and rolled off behind the shrubbery that skirted the path. With James hidden from view, Mike had no idea who had jumped him, but he knew who was going to finish it.

Mike leapt the hedgerow after his assailant. A fist hit him behind the ear and he went down grappling with James. After a moment’s struggle, Mike had both of his attacker’s wrists in his hands and was surprised to find he was lying on top of James.

Mike pinned James’s hands above his head against the ground. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” he shouted.

“You son of a bitch,” started James.

“Oh, what the hell did I do now?” said Mike in a rather world-weary voice. Once Mike realized it was James who had attacked him, he was much more comfortable restraining him. Here was a bloke Mike knew he could beat into a pulp if necessary. Although, James did get in a few good licks there… Not bad, tosser.

“It’s about what you did two nights ago. And other nights and days before that,” said James. Mike rolled his eyes.

“You’re already punishing me for what I did two nights ago,” he said with slight annoyance. “So what? You’re going to beat me up too? Did she really mean all that much to you?”

“You didn’t see her face,” said James. “You hurt her.”

“I didn’t do anything that she didn’t say was alright,” Mike responded defensively, “If she says I raped her—“

“No,” said James, “you daft git, no. She’s not saying it was rape. I’m saying that it was you that talked her into thinking it was a good idea. You knew she was my girl. You knew it, and you shagged her anyway!”

Something inside of James snapped with that statement. The part of his brain that stored all past injuries emptied out and he ranted at Mike for all of his injustices to him: stealing other women, the jokes, the humiliating the rounds of Dare Devil at parties, the shirtless arrogance of that arsehole. It all came out in a flood of words and bile.

Mike stared at James as he spouted off about what Mike considered ancient history – not that he remembered all of what James was saying. Wow… did I really shut him up in a cupboard with Sheila Mulligan? Jesus… James was starting to tear up from his rage. Mike followed his first instinct without thinking.

Mike kissed him.

At first, James was so shocked he didn’t respond at all. What was his game? What the fuck is this? What is he trying to do?

But the kiss persisted and slowly, by degrees, James followed along. He felt Mike melt into him; the hands that once restrained his were now caressing his wrists and the weight on top of him didn’t feel prohibitive and weighty. This was definitely weird. And what was that?

Mike began to slowly grind himself on James. He was getting hard. Oh sweet Jesus… this was so bad it was good… it felt…dirty… wrong… and yet…

Mike took a risk and licked James’s lips, seeking access to his hot mouth. James automatically responded. There was no thought involved here. It was as if James were watching this happen to another James; it was surreal. Mike’s tongue felt like warm velvet, hot and muscular, like the man himself.

James tasted like tea, mint, and honey. Holy shit… that’s so not like I pictured… more… want more…. Mike continued to rut his erection against James’s thigh, the friction felt so good against his throbbing cock. He knew James knew that he was hard. He couldn’t be that stupid. A few more undulations from his hips and he felt James’s cock respond. Oh yes… that was it… so fucking different… and really really good…

James was aghast at his body’s response to this. Oh fuck. Oh, fuck. I’m hard. He’s hard… what the fuck is this? Panic filled his chest and James took advantage of Mike’s relaxed grip, flipped them both over, and jumped to his feet, erection and all.

“What the fuck was that?” he said. He tried to control his breathing, but he felt like he had just run a five kilometer race. He felt his erection soften at the lack of contact and he was so very grateful.

Mike looked up at him from the ground, leaning on his elbows. His erection stood proud and unabated. “I didn’t know what else to do, mate,” he said. His breathing was erratic as well. They were both flushed from the kiss. Mike continued: “You were upset. I was just trying to calm you down. You looked like you could use one.”

“What?” said James, “’Use one’? What the fuck is that? Listen, the next time I need to be kissed, I will not be coming to you, alright?”

“You seemed to be enjoying yourself,” said Mike, flashing that wolfish grin.

“Shut up,” said James. “Fuck off.” James started to walk off.

“If you want another, I’m right here,” said Mike after him.

James turned to face him. “You want to kiss me again? Seriously?”

Mike couldn’t tell if James was disgusted at the thought or genuinely curious, so he went with his gut and said: “Well… yeah, truth be told.”

James stared at him for a long moment. Then, without a word, he turned on his heel and walked away. Mike was suddenly sick to his stomach. Holy Christ. He was actually worried about what James thought of him. This had never happened to Mike before and he prayed instinctively:

Jesus, please… please don’t let James hate me.

 

~080~

 

“Permission to enter the Mind Palace,” Tom said softly.

Ben lifted his head reluctantly. He had wanted to be alone for the whole day if he could manage it, but obviously it was just not his luck. He did do his best to try, however. He got to the library early enough to where there was no one about but the staff. He went down to the archive basement where there were private study rooms and picked one that was at the far reaches of the labyrinthine room. Once there, he closed the door, breathed a sigh of relief and set to work on studying about interstellar space.

Two hours later, he heard Tom’s voice from behind the door.

He closed his eyes in frustration. “Permission granted,” he said, trying desperately to stifle an exasperated sigh.

Tom looked and smelled wonderful. He was wearing his leather jacket and between the smell of the leather and how Tom looked in it, it just worked for him. Tom pulled a chair out from the tiny table and sat down.

“I thought we could talk about what happened,” said Tom.

“Nothing happened,” said Ben, “It was a mistake.”

Tom looked at him in shock. Surely Ben didn’t want to sweep it all under the rug and pretend like it… like that connection never happened. Ben’s steady gaze told Tom that he was being truthful. As if to eliminate any doubt, Ben said: “I mean it, mate. It was a mistake and I’m sorry. I haven’t got time for fooling around like that. I really need to focus this year.”

Tom looked at Ben puzzled. “’Fooling around’? Who the fuck was fooling around? I wasn’t trying to pick you up for a quick fuck… and as I recall, you kissed me.”

“Then the mistake was mine,” said Ben. He didn’t want to quibble over who started what. He just wanted it to end, the sooner the better. But… oh God, Tom did look good. And that kiss was amazing; so fucking perfect. Ben felt his cock twitch at the thought.

No. Stop. That’s not the direction I need to go in.

Ben squared his shoulders and said, “I need to focus this year. There’s heavy competition to study with Professor Tyson in the States this coming summer. I can’t lose this opportunity.”

“Oh… I see,” said Tom. He looked so crestfallen that Ben just wanted to kiss him again.

“I am sorry, Tom,” said Ben. “I just can’t do this right now. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have done anything. It was an impulse reaction and I promise you, it won’t happen again.”

“Right,” said Tom. “Well… I guess… that ends that.” He made to leave and stopped. He turned to Ben and asked, “Did you enjoy it?” Ben shot him a curious look. “I mean it. Did you enjoy it? Just… out of curiosity.”

Ben thought a moment. He said, “Yes, I did. It was… nice.” His eyes stared off into space, clearly lost in the memory of it.

“Just ‘nice’?” said Tom.

“No,” said Ben. “If I’m honest, it was pretty damn spectacular.” A small smile crept across his face.

Tom grinned. “Then you won’t object to another.”

Ben looked at him sharply. “Tom,” he said, “didn’t I just finish explaining—“

“A goodbye kiss,” Tom interrupted. “Just one. One more and then no more.”

Ben never wanted a kiss so badly in his life. He imagined kissing Tom, the feel of his tongue in his mouth, the touch of his hands in Tom’s hair. Ben imagined Tom’s caressing hands moving swiftly down his chest and feeling over his crotch for Ben’s erection, their two bodies grinding against each other here in this seclusion with only the furniture and a few books as witness.

Ben was standing up before he realized it. Tom stepped forward toward him.

Oh dear God… this can’t happen. This just can’t. He will find out that I don’t know much and it’ll be awful. I can’t. He can’t know. Stop. Stop this.

“No,” said Ben.

A light went out in Tom’s eyes. “No?” said Tom. “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” said Ben, clearing his throat. “Quite sure. My studies come first. I can’t… I just can’t. I’m sorry, Tom.”

 

~080~

 

Later that evening, James hopped into the shower still trying to sort out what happened that afternoon. Mike, arrogant prick extraordinaire, had kissed him. And had said that he wanted to do it again. Jesus. What the hell was that?

He went to the rugby pitch intending to have an argument. Instead he got snogged. By MIKE! James shook his head under the warm water. Had the world suddenly turned on its ear and no one told him? Since when was Mike even gay? He fucked more women than anyone James had ever known. It didn’t make any sense.

James recalled the kiss but he couldn’t say why his brain conjured it up. It should be revolting to him, and he did feel a little flutter in his stomach at the thought, but it was not a flutter of nausea. James was turned on.

James’s dick twitched a bit at this realization. He didn’t mind the kiss. He didn’t mind Mike’s weight on top of him, the pressure of his mouth, or the feel of his stubble. He even liked the taste: tea and something earthy. He remembered how Mike’s tongue felt against his lips and his erection was fully realized.

His penis stood out thick and proud from his body and James stared at it, fascinated. The thought of kissing Mike, the recollection of that kiss, was enough to create a full-blown erection. Mother of God.

Well… may as well have a wank. James slicked up his cock with some soap and began to stroke himself.

James pictured Eve. She may be a lot of negative things to him, but she would always be a pretty good fantasy fuck. He pictured her in a small negligee and she was taking down the straps off of each shoulder. James watched it fall to the floor. Her perfect smile was only for him. Beautiful. Such perfect skin. Such amazing tits. Her nipples stood erect, just waiting for James to kiss and suck on them. But somehow, the fantasy shifted.

Suddenly, Eve was on her knees before him in the shower. Oh dear God yes… that’s even better. Suck me off, beautiful. She smiled up at him and grasped his shaft, opened her mouth… and …

In his mind’s eye, James saw Mike kneeling before him and sucking him off, his cheek stretching as the head moved against the inside, Mike’s hungry eyes watching James like a hawk. 

What the ever-loving fuck?!

This is so fucking wrong… but damn… oh, God to see that arrogant prick suck his cock… damn…

James stroked himself with a practiced hand as he imagined new possibilities in this fantasy. But since the fantasy and the acts were relatively unfamiliar, he only got quick glimpses. His mind showed him visions as if through a peep-hole. Lights went up and Mike was on his knees sucking him off and moaning with pleasure at the taste of him. Jesus fuck, that mouth…

Lights faded and were brought up on a different scene: Mike jerking off in front of James, his cock impressive and Mike staring at James the whole time with those piercing blue eyes. Mike said: ‘You like to watch, don’t you?’ … yes, Mike… Jesus… yes I do… 

Then: Mike stroking James, his hard calloused hand slicked with soap and Mike was saying filthy things into his ear: ‘I really want you to fuck me. This dick would feel so good inside me. Please, James…’ Son of a bitch… so fucking hot…

The next vignette had both their dicks held together in one of Mike’s hands and they were kissing again, deep, passionate kisses that were enough to make them both cum. More… oh, fuck… more…

Then it was James buggering Mike, plunging deep inside him, slick and hot, and causing Mike’s back to arch and Mike to cry out James’s name in his passion as he came hard against the tile of the bath. ‘Oh God, James… shit… fuck me… that’s it, James… deep… oh Jesus… just like that… oh God, James…. All yours…. All yours to fuck… Oh God, oh GodohGodohGod…. Hnnngggggg…..’

James came in thick ropes of cum over his hand and thighs. As he caught his breath, he watched the water wash his ejaculate away. Idly, he wondered if Mike was a spit or swallow kind of guy. He chuckled and decided it didn’t matter.

Later as he crawled into bed, he wondered if one fantasy and liking one kiss made a man gay. Or bisexual. Or pansexual. Too confusing. He’d think about it tomorrow.

All James really knew was, Mike was one hell of a good fantasy fuck.


	5. Advice to the Lovelorn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secrets are revealed. Two willingly, one unwillingly, and one secret remains hidden.
> 
> Oh yeah... and Mike is an ass.
> 
> Again.

“Hey, Tom,” said James. “You got a minute?”

They were on the steps of the library. Tom thought he’d give talking to Ben one more shot before he finally threw in the towel where a potential relationship was concerned. James was a bit out of breath from legging it while following Tom. He had to confide in someone about that fantasy and the kiss and James trusted Tom. They all trusted Tom. Of course, it helped that Tom was the only gay guy in the house.

“Sure,” said Tom. “What’s up, mate?”

‘Uh… You’re going to think this is weird. Well… maybe not that weird. But it was weird for me,” James began. “It’s to do with Mike.”

“What are you on about?” asked Tom. “What about Mike? Did he do something again?”

“Well… yeah. He did,” said James. He shifted his weight from foot to foot nervously. “He… well… he sort of… kissed me yesterday.”

“What?!” said Tom.

“I know, I know, mate,” said James. “Like I said… weird.”

“What do you mean ‘kissed you’? You mean like grabbing your face and kissing your cheek roughly. He does do that when he’s really happy about something,” said Tom

“Um…,” said James. “Nope.”

Tom’s eyes nearly fell out of his head. “You mean he full-on snogged you?”

“Yes…,” said James rather sheepishly.

“And what did you do?” asked Tom.

“I kissed him back, I guess,” said James.

Tom was so shocked that he barely managed to get out: “What?”

“Like I said…” James exhorted more forcefully, “weird.”

Tom thought for a moment. James continued to twitch nervously, looking around the campus like a criminal that had just committed murder. Finally Tom asked: “So… you enjoyed it?”

James regarded him with wide eyes. “Yeah,” he said. “I suppose I did.” After a pause his face reddened and he added: “Wanked off to it too. After.”

“You liar,” said Tom. “You never! Are you fucking kidding me with this? You wanked off…” and here his voice dropped to a whisper, “… to the thought of Mike kissing you?”

“I wanked to more than that, mate,” said James. He felt a bit better having told the truth to someone. It was like a relief. “It was all about Mike though. I tried to think of Eve at first, but my brain substituted Mike and I just went with it.”

Tom was stunned. Jesus Christ on the cross… James… and MIKE? Holy God.

“Does this mean I’m actually gay?” asked James. Of course this had been the question that had plagued him ever since he decided he liked Mike kissing him. Tom was the only authority on homosexuality that he trusted with this information.

Tom laughed at the question. “Are you worried that you are?” he asked, completely amused at the candor of James’s question.

“Well… I wouldn’t say ‘worried’, exactly. I just don’t know how to feel about all this,” said James. “I mean, I’ve never actually kissed a bloke before and… I’ve never really thought about kissing blokes before. It’s not as if I’ve dated men in the past or anything. I mean… this is my first gay… anything.” James looked so nervous, Tom was afraid that he might actually cry in front of him.

“First of all, it’s alright, mate,” said Tom, guiding them to sit at a stone bench in the shade. “What has happened has just… expanded your horizons. That’s all. Nothing to worry about.” James smiled at him, relieved. “Sometimes,” continued Tom, “there aren’t proper labels for these things. You and Mike have always been closer to each other than either Ben or me. It’s only natural that you’d think of him in a different light… and he, you.”

“We’re not closer,” said James.

“Yes you are, mate,” retorted Tom. “You’re always after the same women, he’s constantly picking on you, the practical jokes, the embarrassing shit that happens to you. It’s all Mike. Think about it: it’s like that little boy who pulls the pigtails on the girl in front of him in class. It’s all for attention – your attention – that Mike does these things. Surely you’ve noticed.”

James thought his head was going to explode. This made so much fucking sense. And yet, it made no fucking sense whatsoever. He wasn’t gay, but he was attracted to a man. That man was attracted to him, but he wasn’t gay either. They kissed and it was amazing, but they weren’t a couple, and yet, they had spent more time getting on each other’s wick than anything else the entire time they’ve known one another, which belied a deeper feeling for one another that they were either too stupid or too myopic to recognize…

James had a headache.

Weakly, he turned to Tom and said, “Cheers, mate. I think.”

Tom grinned at him. “Love is confusing as fuck, innit?”

James gave him a lop-sided grin. “Yeah,” he said. “Whoa… who said anything about love? This is Mike we’re talking about. Personally, I don’t think he’s capable of something as extraordinarily altruistic as love, do you? I mean, he doesn’t exactly strike one as the type of bloke to commit in a relationship. Christ, I’m not sure that he knows how to spell ‘relationhip’.”

Tom laughed. “Are you looking for a relationship with him?” he asked. “Seriously?”

James thought a moment. “Well, maybe I spoke too quickly,” he said, “but now that it’s out there… what the hell? I mean, ever since that kiss… I can’t really get him out of my head.” After a pause he added: “And I don’t really mind it, you know. It’s…”

“Weird,” Tom finished for him.

“Yeah,” said James, a wistful look gracing his features. “What the fuck am I going to do?”

“Well, you said he wanted to kiss you again,” said Tom.

“Yeah,” said James, “but I really just don’t want to be his next fuck. There’s no point to it then. I mean, sex is great, but it’s not everything.”

“Agreed,” said Tom. The two men sat on the bench lost in their own thoughts for a moment. Finally Tom spoke again, “Hey, have you ever seen that movie ‘Strangers on a Train’?”

“What?” said James startled at the non sequitur, “You mean the old black and white film about the two men who offer to kill each other’s wives and think they’ll get away with it because they’re strangers?”

“That’s the one,” said Tom, “What if I talk to Mike and you talk to Ben for me?”

“What have you got to say to Ben?” said James.

Tom told him everything: the kiss, the awkwardness, the first rejection, all of it.

“Wow,” said James, “I mean, I figured Ben was… I don’t know… asexual or something. I had no idea he cared for you, but then… he did defend you when we confronted Mike. It makes sense.”

“So will you help me if I help you?” asked Tom, his eyes pleading.

“Sure thing, mate,” said James, cheerily. “I’d be glad to.”

Tom and James shook hands and went their separate ways: James to the library to talk to Ben, and Tom went to his communication studies class, because now he was going to be late.

 

~080~

 

After a fruitless search of the upper floors of the library, James asked a staff member about where Ben might be. The basement archive level, private study room twenty-five; of course the library staff would know exactly where Ben was. He practically lived at the damn library.

James knocked softly at the door. He heard the shuffle of a chair and the door opened. James looked up at Ben’s bloodshot eyes.

“Jesus,” said James, “you alright, mate?”

“Fine,” said Ben. He was not about to tell James that he had been up most of the night crying, worried sick about his decision to push Tom away. Tom was too good for him, he concluded. What would he ever want with a man like Ben anyway? It made no sense.

And now James was here. What was all this? Ben asked, “Why? What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you,” said James.

“That’s fine,” said Ben, opening the door wider, “but I’ve got class in fifteen minutes so make it fast.” Ben began to pack up his books. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Tom,” said James. Ben stopped stock still. His crystalline blue eyes shot to James.

“What about Tom?” he asked, somehow managing to keep his voice casual, and continued to pack his books and papers up.

“Tom wants you to give him a chance,” said James.

“Why are you standing here talking to me and not Tom?” said Ben. He didn’t want his private affairs to be known by too many people and this was just the line in the sand crossed.

“Because he asked me to,” said James. Should he risk telling Ben about Mike and him? To show completely what Tom and he were up to and that it wasn’t a bad thing? James decided to keep silent for now.

“Why did he ask you to speak to me?” said Ben, now rendered incredibly paranoid.

“Look,” said James, slightly exasperated, “I just came here to ask you to let him have a second chance. He doesn’t want to get in the way of your studies. He wants to help you if he can –“

Ben cut him off with a snarky laugh. “The man doesn’t know his basic times tables and he wants to help me? What with? A poetic appreciation of interstellar space? Perhaps an interpretive dance about the planets?” Ben shook his head. “Don’t make me laugh, mate.”

James pinched the bridge of his nose and heaved a sigh. “He said you’d be stubborn,” he said, “And practically impossible.”

Ben held his books in one arm and stood up to his full height. He towered over James and looked down his nose at him. “Well then,” he said, defensively, “I suppose he shouldn’t have bothered to send you.” He added: “And just why did he send you, exactly?”

“Because he’s talking to Mike for me,” said James, not intimidated in the least by Ben’s posturing. As for James, his hands were on his hips as he looked directly into Ben’s eyes.

“Whatever for?” asked Ben, now thoroughly confused.

“Mike kissed me,” said James. Wow… that was easy.

“He… what?” said Ben. “You’re taking the piss.”

“God’s honest truth, mate,” said James. “So he’s talking to Mike. And I’m talking to you. Criss-cross… just like the movie. Tom’s idea.”

“The movie?” said Ben, “Oh yeah… ‘Throw Momma from the Train’… stupid film.”

“Not that film… ugh. Never mind,” said James. “Will you give him a chance or not?”

“Not,” said Ben.

“Why?” said James, “and don’t give me some crap excuse about your studies being more important. Your grades are the highest in our class and you know it. You only study so much to avoid human interaction. We all know that.

“You’re an introvert. Fine, that’s fine… no one cares. Only don’t push away something good just because you’re scared of it. Tom’s pretty worldly-wise when it comes to relationships. He could be good for you, you know.” James paused watching Ben carefully. He was holding tight onto something and James didn’t know what it was… but he thought… no. It couldn’t be. But then… it could, couldn’t it?

“You’re a virgin, aren’t you?” James asked him. Ben didn’t move but his jaw clenched and he blushed deeply. James had gotten to the root of the problem then.

James grinned up at him and said, “So, you’re scared he’ll find out and… what? Take the piss? Come on, man! This is Tom we’re talking about! Sweet, peace-loving, kind-as-they-come, Tom! What the fuck are you so afraid of?”

Ben didn’t answer him. He just looked like he was on the verge of tears. James dropped his grin. His face took on a grave countenance. Softly he said, “Listen, mate. I didn’t mean to upset you, but there really is nothing to be afraid of. I mean, Jesus… look at me! I’m thinking of starting up a relationship with the biggest prick on the planet! I don’t know if that makes me the gayest man to walk the earth or the biggest idiot. I’m terrified too. This is all new to me. I actually think that I’m a bigger virgin than you when it comes down to this.”

Ben grinned at him. He couldn’t help himself. James grinned back. “Just don’t shut the door on this,” said James. “He’s a great bloke. He really cares about you. Think about it, yeah?”

“Yeah,” said Ben, softly. “I will.” And then, “Cheers, mate. Good luck with the prick.”

James watched him go, leaning on the doorframe of the tiny study room and smiled. Good luck with the prick, indeed. He checked his watch and strode from the library into the overcast English morning.

 

~080~

 

Tom didn’t catch up with Mike until later that afternoon. “No rugby practice today then?” he asked as he knocked softly on Mike’s open door. Mike looked up at him with a huge shiner on his left eye.

“What the hell happened to you?” Tom asked.

“James happened,” Mike admitted glumly.

“Oh that’s right, he did mention you two got in a fight,” said Tom, a bemused grin sneaking across his face. Tom and Mike hadn’t really spoken since the kiss they had exchanged a few days back. Tom was actually a bit nervous about being alone with him. The first part of that experience was a bit… pushy. Mike was a strong guy. Tom was still angry over how Mike treated him once the kiss was over with. To know that it was all a joke done for a bet… it was too offensive for words. Tom was happy James was able to really sock him one. It felt good.

“He did, did he?” said Mike. “I don’t suppose he told you that he got me two cracked ribs as well. I landed on a tree root. I’m off the club’s roster for the next three games because of injury.” Mike truly looked depressed. He lived for rugby.

“Jesus, no,” said Tom, “I don’t suppose he realized that you were injured that badly. Sorry, mate.” The two men were silent for a moment.

Mike perked up and said, “Hey… that reminds me.” He went over to a dresser drawer and pulled out a roll of cash. He spread it out and divvied it up equally. “Here,” he said, handing half the bills to Tom, “that’s your share.”

“My share?” said Tom looking at the money in his hand. “My share of what?”

“You’re share of the bet, of course,” said Mike with a proud grin. “I hope you’re not too angry about it, mate. But hell, what’s a little humiliation if you can make some money in exchange, right?” He flashed his toothy grin at Tom.

“You’re giving me money you earned by betting that you could kiss me?” said Tom. His anger rose as he spoke. “You’re paying me off for being your… fucking… rube? Are you kidding me with this shit?”

“What’s the matter, mate?” said Mike, genuinely confused. “Why not make some money off a stupid stunt. I mean, it’s not as if you and I like each other like that. Right?”

Tom was so angry he was shaking. The fucking prick… he had no idea… none at all… son of a bitch… son of a fucking bitch…

“No,” said Tom, his anger at the boiling point, “no we don’t like each other at all. And you can keep your damn money. I don’t want a fucking penny.”

“Why not?” said Mike. What the hell was Tom’s problem anyway?

Could Mike really be that thick? Jesus… “Because I’m no one’s whore,” Tom said, and he stalked out of the room.

“It’s not as if we had sex, Tom. Jesus! It was only a fucking kiss!” Mike shouted after him.

Tom left the house slamming the door behind him. He’d rather be studying chemistry than to spend one more second in the house with that… prick.


	6. Tom's Bad Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter that is as it says on the tin: Tom's in for a really bad day. Poor sod.
> 
> Lots of angst in this one.

“Alright?” said James to Mike. James hadn’t a chance to talk to Tom that afternoon to see how things went with Mike and to tell him how things went when he talked to Ben. Sometimes the guys passed like ships in the night around the house. It wasn’t unusual, but James would have preferred to speak to Tom before talking to Mike about what happened.

“Alright?" said Mike. He was doing the washing up. His bad behavior and general disrespect of his housemates garnered him this punishment for a month. He was shirtless as usual and James watched the way his muscles played underneath his skin in the late afternoon light as he scrubbed a rather large pot. Fucking hell…

“Have you come to make sure I don’t miss a cup or something?” Mike asked.

“No,” said James, “I wanted to talk to you about what Tom spoke to you about.”

Mike dropped his hands and tilted his head to the ceiling in exasperation. “What the fuck… alright. Let’s have it then.”

“What are you talking about?” said James.

“What do you mean ‘what am I talking about’?” said Mike, clearly confused. “Aren’t you going to rip me a new one over what happened between Tom and me at the party? And then rip me another new one over the money thing?” James shot him a look of pure mystification. “Well… let’s have it. Or maybe you just want to take a swing at me again?” Mike pointed to his left eye where it was a brilliant blue-black-purple hue.

“What the hell are you on about?” said James. “What happened at the party between you and Tom?”

“You mean he didn’t tell you that I snogged him?” said Mike. James’s jaw dropped. “Yeah, yeah…,” continued Mike, waving a soapy dismissive hand in the air, “Jesus, it was a bet. A stupid bet. I tried to give Tom his share of the money about an hour ago and he threw it in my face and said he wasn’t anyone’s whore.” Mike shook his head and went back to scrubbing the pot with new vigor. “Whatever…,” he said.

“You used Tom… and then tried to pay him off?” said James, a new breed of revulsion developing in his chest.

“I didn’t use him…,” said Mike. “Why do you think I tried to split the cash with him?”

James shook his head in disbelief. “Man, you are some kind of fucked up.”

“What?” said Mike, “I really don’t see what the problem is.”

James took a deep breath. This wasn’t going to be easy. Mike was so fucking myopic when it came to how others felt. This was going to be like trying to explain football to an alien with no legs. “Mate, let me ask you this: was Tom aware of your bet before you kissed him?” asked James.

“Well,” said Mike. “No.” James sighed. “But I didn’t think he’d mind,” explained Mike. “I mean, a bloke kisses blokes all the time, he’s not going to mind another bloke kissing him too, right?”

“Jesus H. Christ on a bicycle, Mike!” said James, “Just because a bloke is gay doesn’t mean he’s not picky! Or that he doesn’t have fucking feelings, mate! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

Mike was silent. James could see the gears and levers clicking behind his eyes. Obviously this was new information to Mike. James couldn’t believe that anyone could be this stupid about people.

James said, “Think about it, Mike: have you ever seen Tom with anyone?”

“Now that you mention,” Mike said, “the only bloke I saw him with was at the beginning of the term… Gary… Jerry… something…”

“Yeah,” said James, “and that lasted for six weeks because the bastard was cheating on Tom with another guy.”

“Oh,” said Mike, “Is that what happened?”

“Yeah,” said James. “Jesus, you really are that self-absorbed, aren’t you?” Mike didn’t say anything to this. Taking his opportunity, James went on: “Tom actually fancied you for a bit, you know.”

“He did?” said Mike. “But I’m not gay.”

James raised an eyebrow at this. “We’ll get to that subject in a minute,” he said. “Tom knew you would never go for him, but he would look all the same. So put two and two together… Tom fancies you a bit, you invite him to snog, it turns out to be a joke, everyone has a laugh – excepting Tom, of course – and you try to pay him off. Now doesn’t that give him a reason to be angry with you?”

“Well…” said Mike, “now that you’ve put it that way… Jesus. Oh shit. But—but I didn’t know!”

“Yeah, well… add that to the list of shit you don’t know,” said James, sardonically. “I’m pretty sure it’s so long it could fit on three bog rolls by now.”

“Oi!” said Mike. He washed off the pot and placed it in the dish strainer. He wiped off his hands with a clean tea towel, threw it over one naked shoulder, and walked up closely to James. James could see the flecks of green in his eyes. My God, how beautiful he was…

“Why are you here, anyway?” said Mike.

It took James just a moment to respond. Good Lord, he wanted to kiss Mike again. “Tom never spoke to you about anything else, eh?” asked James, trying desperately to catch his breath.

“No,” said Mike, “He just threw the money at me and left. Why?”

“I see,” said James. “No reason. Just wondered. Never mind.” James turned on his heel and left the kitchen. He heard Mike call after him, but he didn’t turn around. He just headed upstairs.

He really should have found Tom and spoke with him beforehand. James felt humiliated that he left the kitchen without talking to Mike about the kiss, but he was still concerned that Mike would just steamroll over his life. He knew what Mike had done to Tom… and they were just mates. Could you imagine what Mike would be like to date? Fucking hell….

Another thought occurred to James as he shut the door to his room: Ben had no idea about what happened between Tom and Mike. Jesus… Ben would be pissed as hell if he found out; especially since he cared so deeply for Tom.

But that didn’t solve James’s problem. He was really depending on Tom to help him out and Tom let him down. Bloody coward.

James got up and left the house. He was going to give Tom a piece of his fucking mind.

 

~080~

 

There was a knock at Ben’s study room door. He opened it up to find a nervous-looking Tom on the other side.

“Hello,” said Ben.

“Hello,” said Tom, “Permission to enter?” Tom had his head cocked down to the side and looked up at Ben through golden lashes. It was all Ben could do to remember to breathe.

“Permission granted,” said Ben finally, waving his hand at one of the two empty chairs in the room.

“I wanted to catch you,” began Tom, “before you had a chance to start getting engrossed.” Tom had been walking idly across the campus trying to piece together what he would say to Ben while simultaneously trying to push his argument with Mike from his mind. But now he could see that he’d been too long about it. There were already three books open on the table along with forty star charts and maps of the sky. “But I see that I’m a bit late. Sorry,” he said as he took a seat.

Ben did manage to save Tom some trouble in bringing up the subject of ‘them’: “You want to talk about the kiss,” he said as he sat, “and a possible… relationship.” Tom nodded. “James and I spoke about an hour ago. And I’ve been thinking…”

Tom’s heart leapt into his throat. All he really wanted to do at this moment was press Ben up against one of the concrete walls and snog him senseless. Please… dear God, please…

“I really do have to concentrate, right here, right now…,” Ben said, “But… I am not… adverse to the idea of having a relationship with you -- as long as it is after the end of term.”

“After the end of term? Aren’t you supposed to be going to study abroad in the States at the end of term?” said Tom.

“Well… yes,” said Ben. “If I win a place, but it would be after that. We could get together after that.”

“That’s practically a year from now,” said Tom.

Ben looked at his hands and said quietly, “Yes. I know.”

“So… you’re saying we have a chance, but that I should wait… a year,” said Tom. He was becoming more heartbroken as this conversation went on.

“Just so,” said Ben. He turned to his work on the table and didn’t meet Tom’s eyes anymore. He didn’t want to see the tears that he knew were building in those beautiful blue orbs. They reminded him of images he’d seen of the planet Neptune.

“I see,” said Tom, but he really didn’t. “I guess I’ll just leave you then. Happy studying.” Tom got up to leave and stood there a moment, hoping that Ben would at least look at him before he left. Ben never raised his head.

Tom closed the door to the study room behind him and only got as far as the stairwell before he started to cry.

 

~080~

 

Ben was fairly aching to hold Tom when he stood up to leave. Ben felt him standing there, just standing. Then he heard the door close. He put his head down on the desk and wept silently.

Oh dear God, Tom… what have I done? I’m so sorry… 

Ben closed his eyes and pictured how things should have gone: He should have stood up and looked at Tom. He should have wiped the tears from Tom’s eyes as he did before. He should have held the man so close. Ben imagined feeling Tom’s heartbeat through his skin as they held each other. The heat of Tom coming off of him in that cold basement would have been so comforting. To feel his breath: in and out… in and out… a steady rhythm that he could cling to.

He imagined pulling a bit away to look into Tom’s eyes. I’m so sorry, Tom… Please forgive me… I want you… so badly…

A tender meeting of lips, just for a moment, and then Ben would softly kiss Tom’s face: cheeks, forehead, eyelids, nose, jawline, ears, throat, pulse points along his neck, and finally that beautiful mouth. Taking his time, licking those lips, feeling them part… Ben wanted this for Tom: to comfort and caress him the way he should be, to card his hands through those curls. And Ben would feel Tom’s hands on him too, tracing hot lines of fire all over his body… oh dear God… too fucking perfect.

Ben was hard. He couldn’t help it. Tom took over his every thought. He gave in, locking the study room door behind him, he unzipped his trousers, running a finger over his length, feeling sparks fly down his legs at the touch. He felt his cock twitch and fill as he slowly palmed its building hardness. He imagined it was Tom touching him as they stood there. He would slowly suck on Tom’s neck as he let Tom stroke him through his pants, thumbing over his slit, spreading the wetness of the precum on his pants.

Ben pulled his pants down and let his precum coat his fingers and slick up his shaft… so fucking good, Tom… please… please get me off… I need this… Ben fairly growled these words into Tom’s ear. Ben caressed down Tom’s frame, his fingers stopping momentarily to tease a nipple before taking hold of Tom’s belt and unfastening his trousers. Ben imagined Tom’s cock springing free and though he had never actually seen Tom naked before, he imagined that his penis would be like him: long, lean, slightly curved… Jesus… yes…

Ben stroked himself slowly, aching for the fantasy to continue. The taste of Tom’s kiss was strong in his memory and he held onto the thought as he kissed his friend/ housemate/ lover and felt his hand stroking strong and steady on his throbbing cock. Ben wanked Tom in the same rhythm and they breathed into each other’s mouths, staring into each other’s eyes. I need you, Tom… I so sorry I pushed you away… fuck the States… fuck my precious studies… this is what I want… right here… now… you… only you, Tom… please…

He imagined their dicks rubbing together in both of their hands and watching the expression of ecstasy on Tom’s face as his climax built. He heard Tom’s voice in his ear, his breath hot on his face… Fuck… so good… you feel so fucking good, mate… just made for me… so fucking perfect… more… tighter… ah, that’s it… just like that… son of a… shit… oh, Ben… oh Ben.. I knew it would be so good… my Ben… oh my sweet Benedict… oh.. oh oh oh oh!!!

Ben came as quietly as he could into his hand. He cleaned himself up with some spare tracing paper he had. It wasn’t the cleanest he could get himself, but it would have to do.

He sat back and caught his breath. Tom was a distraction, alright. But James was right: he was a sincere bloke, a good man. If Ben was completely honest, he really didn’t see a downside to being with him. It would be nice to share a bed, have a cuddle, and talk to his sweet face about the universe and all her mysteries until Tom drifted off to sleep.

Ben smiled at the thought and then frowned, sitting up straight in his chair. He had to tell Tom. Tom thought he was rejected – well… put off, anyway. Ben had to set the record straight. He had to tell Tom he – he what?… Jesus…

He had to tell Tom that he loved him.

 

~080~

 

Tom left the library and headed toward the house. He was three streets away before he ran into James. A very angry James.

“You bloody coward,” James said.

“What?” said Tom.

“You never said a fucking word to Mike, did you, you git?” said James.

Oh shit. Oh shit, I didn’t. Damn.

Tom turned beet red and said, “Oh dear God, James… I’m so sorry, mate. But you don’t understand--”

“Well you’re damn lucky I didn’t say fuck all to him about that kiss,” said James, cutting him off. After a pause he said, “And I do understand. Mike told me what happened at the party between you two. And the money thing afterwards. Fucking bastard.” Tom blanched at this. James quickly continued: “I straightened him out about it. And… I had the chance to talk to him about the kiss… but he gave me the impression that you two didn’t speak about it, so… I didn’t say anything.”

“I guess we’re both cowards then,” said Tom, sheepishly half-grinning.

James was about to cut into him for that remark, but it was too much of the truth. He paused a moment and really looked at Tom. He noticed the puffy eyes and the shifty stare. The man had been crying. “What happened?” asked James.

“Ben happened,” said Tom. “I don’t really want to talk about it.”

“Oh fucking hell,” said James. He thought Ben would be more understanding so soon after their conversation. He said he’d think about it. Obviously, he decided against having a relationship with Tom and rejected him for good. Fucking shame, that. “I’m sorry, mate. What are you going to do?”

“What can I do?” said Tom. “I’m going to leave the house.”

“What?” said James. “You can’t do that.”

“Of course I bloody well can,” said Tom, his eyes welling up again. “Look at me: I’m the worst friend in the world to you, I’m intimidated by a Neanderthal, and I’m rubbish at trying to date my fucking housemate! What else can possibly go wrong? Oh! I know! I can be failing Chemistry – which I am! Hooray! Match, set, game!”

Tom pushed past James and ran to the house. He wanted out. He wanted a fresh start. He wanted to throw himself off the roof of the bloody library.

For Tom, this was the end of his fucking Uni career. He was done.

 

~080~

 

James watched Tom run off and realized that he had meant what he said: Tom was going to leave the house. Jesus… James couldn’t let that happen. He had to find Ben and knock some fucking sense into him before Tom left them all behind.

He ran to the library, taking the path past the rugby pitch as it was the quickest way. Practice was just getting out and a few of the lads were gathered on the path as James approached. One of them shouted, “Hey! Isn’t that the poof that got our Mike benched for three? GET ‘IM!”

James didn’t know what hit him. All he felt was a huge weight grab his legs and he hit the ground, all the air knocked out of his lungs. He did his best to recover, turning over to see a fat fist heading toward his face. He turned his head to the side just as the fist connected, softening its power. The others caught up at that moment and suddenly all James could do was to curl up in the fetal position to protect himself as they kicked and punched his head, torso, and legs.

A cry went up from somewhere along the path and more shouting followed. The kicks and punches let up considerably and James risked a look to see Mike pulling men off of him and still others running away down the path behind. James saw Mike lay out two blokes before taking on a third that easily outweighed him by three stone. James got to his feet and bodily tackled the man, clipping him below the hips and pushing his balance off enough to topple him. He then sat on him and lay into him with rights and lefts until he felt someone pull him off the man by his shoulders.

James struggled against the person behind him until he heard Mike’s familiar voice saying, “Let up, mate. Let up! It’s me, Mike. Jesus, but you can fight!”

James spun around. Mike stood there, his black eye standing out from his skin, his lip freshly cut, and grinning from ear to ear.

“You should join the fucking team, you know,” said Mike.

“Yeah,” said James, “I would, but I wouldn’t want to show up a pigeon-chested tosser like you.”

Both men laughed at this and James realized that his lip was split too. There was blood on Mike’s shirt and James pointed it out to him. It was then that James noticed that Mike was breathing funny and leaning over.

“What’s wrong with you?” James asked.

“You busted two of my ribs the other day,” said Mike, “that’s what ‘s wrong.”

“What? I never did,” said James, trying desperately to recall the fight that had happened. All his brain kept coming up with was the kiss they had shared in the dirt afterward.

James wanted to kiss Mike again. He saved his fucking life. Those guys could have killed him, and no mistake.

“Never mind about it. Let’s go home and get cleaned up,” said Mike.

James almost agreed, but then remembered his original mission. He told Mike what happened when he spoke with Tom.

“I thought something was up when he ran off home,” said Mike. James gave him a curious look. Mike admitted: “When you left the house, I went after you. I saw you two talking and let Tom run past me. I wanted to talk to you… about the kiss.”

“Jesus…,” said James and he blushed deeply. “I want to talk about that with you too, but right now, I’ve got to find Ben.”

“He’s in class, mate. Astronomy. Remember?” said Mike.

James could never keep other people’s classes straight, but Mike seemed to memorize them all. Probably good to know where the victims of your next practical joke would be so that you could time them well. Mike was the king of practical jokes.

“No I didn’t remember, but we’ve got to stop Tom,” said James. There was a knot building in his stomach.

“He’s got to pack before he moves out, doesn’t he?” said Mike.

“Well… yeah, I suppose. What’s your point?” said James.

It was Mike’s turn to sigh in exasperation now. “James, James… packing takes time. We’ve got enough time before he leaves and the time that Ben gets back from class, don’t we?”

“Yeah,” said James glumly. He wanted this to be a solved problem already.

“So we’ll go home, head down to the basement, throw our shirts in the wash, talk to Tom… everything will be sorted. It’ll be fine,” said Mike and he gripped one of James’s shoulders gently. Turning James, Mike wrapped an arm around him. James loved the feel of it. Even though he was always jealous of Mike’s height, he felt at this moment that his own height was perfect for this. He took a small risk and wrapped his arm about Mike’s waist as they walked along. 

Mike smiled at him, his eyes filled with something more than just impish glee. They were tender, almost caring. James walked along wondering what that meant and if it was a good thing.


	7. When Dams Burst

Tom ran up the stairs two at a time, his face still wet from crying. He turned into his bedroom, mentally planning his packing and stopped still, frozen to the spot. Ben was sitting on his bed.

For a split second, Tom actually considered the possibility that he had gone completely insane. “What are you doing here?” Tom asked.

“Waiting for you,” said Ben. He was hunched over, his elbows on his knees, hands together in prayer. He looked up at Tom with those mesmerizing almond crystalline eyes and Tom felt his heart stop.

“How did you get here so fast?” said Tom.

“I have a mate with a scooter who owed me a favor,” Ben said. “I need to talk to you.”

“We have nothing to discuss,” said Tom sadly. He went to the wardrobe and retrieved his suitcase from the top.

“Where are you going?” said Ben.

“Away,” said Tom.

“Away from what?” said Ben.

“Away from this house, Uni, everything,” said Tom, “I’ve had enough of this place. I don’t belong here. I can’t breathe anymore.”

Ben stood and took Tom by the shoulders. “How can you say you don’t belong here?” he said, “You belong right here.” He kissed Tom gently on the mouth. “With me,” he said.

“But you said—“ began Tom.

“I know what I said,” Ben replied, “and I’m an idiot. And a coward. And James was right: you’re a stand-up bloke, a good man. I’d be a fool to push you away.”

Tom was speechless. He just watched Ben’s beautiful face as he searched for his next words.

“I’m not very good at this, I’m afraid,” said Ben, softy. He blushed. “I don’t have much… experience… with this.” Ben’s eyes fell away from Tom’s face at this admission. Clearly, he was embarrassed to be saying any of this. But to Tom it made perfect sense: the long nights studying, the lack of social interaction. Ben was just not that into people in general. Small groups were fine, but large social gatherings were just not done. And as for sex… well…

Tom’s eyes softened as he looked at Ben. He took the man’s chin in his finger and thumb and pulled his face up to look at him. “I don’t care about any of that,” said Tom, “I just want to be with you.” Tom softly kissed Ben’s mouth.

It was a slow kiss, full of smoldering heat, but chaste and gentle. Ben thought it was the kindest kiss he’d ever received. He couldn’t help himself. “I love you,” he said.

Tom’s face held a perfect image of delight. “I love you too,” he replied, a gorgeous smile appearing slowly on his face.

Ben began to shake. His nerves had got the better of him and he shut his eyes, silently cursing his body’s betrayal.

“What’s wrong?” Tom asked, “What’s the matter, love?” He took Ben’s face in his hands and pressed his cheek to Ben’s. “Tell me what’s the matter, Ben.”

Ben buried his nose in the crook of Tom’s neck and tried to steady his breath. Tom wrapped his arms about Ben’s shoulders and held him close, stroking the back of his hair. Ben relaxed by degrees and slowly wrapped his arms around Tom’s chest, letting his hands wander up and down, feeling all the curves and dips his muscles made beneath his shirt. It was so peaceful, so comforting… safe. Ben was safe in Tom’s arms.

Taking a deep breath, Ben said, “I’ve never actually… had sex before.”

To his credit, Tom didn’t stop stroking Ben’s hair. He did start rocking Ben and held him a little tighter. “It’s alright,” he told him, “I’m not bothered about all that.”

“Well I am,” said Ben. Tom could tell from his voice that he was on the verge of tears. This was important to Ben. Tom kissed Ben’s temple and pulled his face up and away to look at him. Sure enough, there were tears in his eyes.

Tom looked at Ben with grave, sweet eyes and simply said, “Tell me.”

With that simple command, Ben’s floodgates opened.

The whole ugly story came out about his mate in school, Victor, and how he was Ben’s first kiss, first anything. He told him about the stolen kisses, the lingering embraces, culminating in frottage in a dark cupboard. How no one could know that Victor was gay, how Victor pushed him away after it was all over, denying him access to any part of him ever again and how much that hurt Ben.

Ben told him, with tears streaming down his face, the day that Ben had pushed the issue too far and Victor had punched him in the face, over and over, right in the corridor, in front of everyone… calling him a faggot and a poof… and never wanting to speak to him again…

Tom listened to all this in silence, waiting for Ben to finish. Once he was done, Tom sat him on the edge of the bed, stood before him, and kissed him soundly.

This was a kiss that Ben had earned. He had been through so much in that small, fragile time in his life, and Tom knew he deserved better. He was special. He was dazzling. Tom had to tell Ben that in this kiss.

So he kissed him with all the compassion and mercy he had within him. He kissed him for every bruise, every wound, every scar. He kissed him for every horrible name, every taunt, every emotional hurt. Tom kissed him with unadulterated, unrestrained, pure love. It was all he could do for his friend. He hoped it was enough.

When the kiss broke, they both had tears in their eyes: Tom’s were of compassion, Ben’s of relief.

“Thank you,” said Ben. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” said Tom, “Getting involved with a twat?”

Ben gave a small chuckle. “Yeah… I guess you’re right,” he said, “Victor was a twat.”

“Too right, mate,” said Tom. He added softly: “He had no idea what he had in you.”

Ben looked up at Tom with a sweet sadness in his eyes that broke Tom’s heart. He couldn’t help himself. He kissed Ben again.

The touch of Tom’s lips on Ben’s was enough to make Ben lightheaded. Too fucking perfect… He gripped Tom at the waist and brought him in closer. He felt Tom place his knee on the bed beside his thigh and he went with the momentum, falling backward onto the bed, pulling Tom with him.

Ben was nervous but excited at this turn of events. Now that Tom knew his secret, things were going to be alright. Please God, let it be alright…

Tom let up from the kiss in order for Ben to scoot further up on the bed. Once positioned, they resumed the kiss, Tom laying almost directly on top of Ben. Dear Jesus… what the hell is this? Too fucking good… Ben allowed Tom’s tongue full access to his mouth, feeling the wet velvet smooth slickness darting in and out, teasing his tongue, teeth, lips, and causing Ben to groan audibly with frustration and passion. He had never been so loud before. It felt so… liberating.

Feeling bold, Ben snaked his hands under Tom’s shirt and heard the other man moan his approval. His skin felt hot and smooth underneath his hands and suddenly, Ben couldn’t get enough. He wanted to feel Tom’s skin on his; he needed his heat.

Tom must have needed the same, because he was unfastening the buttons on Ben’s shirt front, but he was doing it so fucking slowly that Ben thought he was going to go insane. He pulled his shirt out of his trousers quickly so to help Tom in his endeavor and raced his hands onto Tom’s back once again.

Tom pulled off the kiss. “Easy, love,” said Tom. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve got all day,” He gave Ben a wicked grin and kissed him with renewed passion.

Ben smiled into Tom’s kiss, easing Tom’s shirt slowly up his back until his hands reached Tom’s shoulders. Tom broke the kiss for a moment and took off the shirt. Ben took that opportunity to remove his own.

Tom hovered over Ben on all fours and just gazed at him. “You are so fucking beautiful,” said Tom softly. Ben’s face reflected the disbelief he felt. “You are, you know,” said Tom. His voice held such tenderness. Ben had never been spoken to like this: as a lover should talk to his beloved. Tom went on: “I’m ashamed to admit that I hadn’t noticed before, but now that I see you… I see all of you. Did you know that your eyes are the exact same color as nebulae in space?”

Ben stared at Tom, fascinated. No one had ever complimented him before. He felt like crying with gratitude. He felt like shouting from the rooftops. It was almost too much, too unreal. He felt he could die a happy man. That this simple loving sentence could incite in him such overwhelming feelings… it was almost sensory overload. Ben was speechless.

“That’s it,” continued Tom, “That’s it exactly… Benedict Cumberbatch, you have the universe in your eyes.” He kissed Ben softly, barely touching his lips. “The whole damn universe… Jesus, you’re… fucking dazzling.”

Ben leaned up and kissed Tom with every fiber of his being, grasping his hips tight enough to leave bruises. Ben guided him down to lay fully against him. The moment their skin touched and Ben could feel Tom along the length of his torso, giving off all that heat, pressing him down into the mattress… Oh dear sweet Jesus… in my sweet, most unreasonable dreams… Oh God, Tom… how I love you.

Their kissing seemed to last an age. Fingertips traced lines of fire over each other, skin developed a sheen of sweat from the heat of their bodies, mouths explored faces, lips, necks, teeth took nips of collarbones, and tongues licked the soft hollows at neck and shoulder.

Beautiful words were exchanged into each other’s ears with endearments meant to be comforting, sheltering; expressive of the love, passion and caring that each man felt for the other. Words like: love, mine, yours, want, need, have, take – to express adoration and desire. And there were other words, laced with that same passionate fire that burns in all lovers: fuck, yes, hot, deep, cum, perfect, sexy, inside, cock, scream, pleasure – to foster burning flames from what used to be glowing embers.

Somewhere between collarbones being nibbled and ears being whispered into, both men had shed the rest of their clothing. This was new territory for Ben and Tom treated him with such tenderness, it made Ben want to weep. This was how it was supposed to be. This was what he had always wanted. It wasn’t just about orgasm. It was about connection, that feeling when you knew you were completely exposed yet felt totally safe. My Tom… only you… I’m all yours… always… until the end of the universe.

Ben’s head rested on the pillow of Tom’s bed, waiting. Tom was retrieving lube and condoms from the desk drawer across the room as he hadn’t a proper nightstand. He watched the ease at which Tom moved across the room, totally comfortable in his own skin. His erection stood out proud from his body as he walked back. Tom stood at the bedside a minute to enjoy the view. He smiled. Ben blushed.

Without a word, Tom got into bed and pulled the duvet down far enough for Ben to get underneath as well. Tom set the lube on a small shelf to the side of his bed and turned to face Ben, holding him close. Their cocks rubbed against one another’s and both men let out a gasp of pleasure at the sensation. Tom pressed his forehead to Ben’s and said, “I know that this is all new to you and I will go slowly. I only want to ask you what you want here.”

“Everything,” said Ben, his breath gone erratic with the sensations his body was taking in. He really couldn’t think very clearly at all. He wondered at Tom’s ability to ignore his throbbing cock in order to formulate sentences. It was all Ben could do right now not to be monosyllabic.

“Do you want to top, Ben?” asked Tom carefully, “It may be easier for you if you do, but you’ll still have to prep me.” Ben didn’t answer him. He honestly didn’t know what he wanted. “Or,” Tom continued, “You could let me top and I could prep you… Honestly, it doesn’t matter to me. I’m just glad to be here with you.”

“Could we,” said Ben, “Could we… start off slowly? And see where it goes?”

“Slowly, like how?” asked Tom.

“Like this,” said Ben and he took both their cocks in his hand and began to stroke them together.

Tom let out a gasp and then a moan of pleasure. “Oh dear God…. This is good… This was… This is a good… idea,” he managed.

It was better than Ben remembered. With Victor things had been rushed. They couldn’t get caught… No… Victor couldn’t get caught. Bloody coward.

This was something new entirely. It was slow, building up a tension that Ben had never known possible. It became something even better when Tom reached back for the lube and added his lubed up hand to the mix.

Fucking Christ! Holy Jesus…. Oh dear God… better than I had ever… shit…. So fucking good…

Both men thrust their hips into Tom’s hand, fucking his fist, feeling the slip of the lube cause their cocks to flip around each other, creating new sensations of pleasure that made them cry out each other’s names, kiss with great fervor, and grasp at each other with hungry hands.

“So close, Ben… I’m so fucking close… and this isn’t even the beginning of what I want to do to you...,” said Tom, “Please, Ben… I want you to cum inside me. Let me have that… please. I want to cum inside you too, but let me have that… Oh please…”

Tom’s words alone were enough to make Ben cum. He nodded – he was past all words at this point – and Tom released both of their cocks. Ben gasped and moaned with the loss of sensation and Tom wisely grasped Ben’s cock at the base to stave off his orgasm as he did with his own. “Come with me,” said Tom.

 

~080~

 

Ben had no idea why Tom wanted to fuck in the shower, but he was all for it. Both men stripped and had a good look at one another. Ben fairly salivated at the sight of a naked Tom. His skin was so pale and perfect, fucking flawless. Tom thought Ben looked almost savage as they stood there waiting for the shower water to get hot. Once under the shower’s spray, each thought the other one looked downright dangerous with his hair slicked back wet, rivulets of water tracing down their skin. Tom was reminded of his earlier fantasy and he shivered.

“May I?” asked Tom as he held up a flannel and some soap. Ben lifted an eyebrow, cocked a grin at him, and nodded.

Ben allowed Tom to lather him up and wash him, taking extra time with his arse, throbbing cock and sack. Then Tom stood against the tile wall and allowed Ben to lather him up and explore his body. Ben thought it was the best shower he’d ever taken. All of Tom’s taut, smooth skin was on display and he watched Ben through half-lidded eyes as Ben explored his body. Tom almost felt as though he were a present at Christmas, the way Ben was studying him, touching him, exploring him. It was delicious.

When Tom turned around and presented Ben with his arse, Ben took his time. He watched as the streams of soapy water came down Tom’s back, travelling in the hollow of his spine and tracing along his crack to the back of his balls and down his legs. Ben never wanted to be a soap bubble so badly in his life. He made sure that all the soap was off Tom before he let his tongue explore what his eyes had just seen.

Tom arched his back at the touch of Ben’s tongue on his spine. Ben interspersed kisses with his licking and if Tom’s erection was lagging before, it was in full force now. Dear God, that mouth… what that mouth could do… Oh bloody hell, the boy’s a natural… Thank you, Jesus…

Ben reached Tom’s arse and let his instincts take over. Down on one knee, he licked and kissed and nibbled on Tom’s arse. Tom’s back arched with pleasure and he moaned Ben’s name. Ben guided Tom’s thighs apart and spread his cheeks. He gave Tom’s arsehole a tentative lick and Tom cried out: “Oh yes… shit… again… please, Ben… again… so fucking good…”

Ben grinned and covered Tom’s arsehole in kisses and licks. Ben noticed that the licking got a more vocal response from Tom. He abandoned the kisses and probed Tom’s arsehole with his tongue. Tom moaned, relaxed his anus and gently moved his hips toward Ben’s tongue. Ben boldly thrust his tongue deep into Tom and proceeded to tongue-fuck him.

Oh my God… yes, Ben… oh shit, just like that… your tongue is amazing… don’t stop… oh Jesus… need more… need more…. Fuck.

Tom passed Ben the bottle of lube he had brought with them, pressing it against one of Ben’s hands that was gripping his hips. Through panting breaths Tom said: “Lube up your hand… one finger… then two… then a third…. Slowly… carefully… I need to feel you inside me, Ben… please.”

Ben did as instructed and kissed Tom’s backside and the base of his spine as he slowly pushed a finger into his lover. When he put in the second finger, and let Tom adjust to the girth, Tom said, “Now love,” he panted, “curve your fingers slightly… and face them toward the front of my body…. You’ll feel a hardness there…AH! Yes! Oh fuck! That’s it… that’s my prostate… shit… dead on, first try… good boy… Oh Jesus! Ahhhhh….!”

Ben smiled at the reaction he was able to incite in Tom. The power he had over this man for pleasure was heady. He wanted to do this to Tom all the fucking time… Jesus, look at him… he’s fucking debauched… Pressed against the tile, Tom looked lost in ecstasy. Ben added a third finger.

“Fuck! Oh fuck! Shit yes… Oh my God, Ben… I need you inside me…. I need to feel the length of you… shit… please, Ben… please… slowly, love… nice and slow…. I know you want this too…,” said Tom.

Ben removed his fingers carefully from Tom, rolled on a condom, added a generous amount of lube, and lined himself up. Slowly, carefully, he pushed his way into Tom’s heat.

The feeling was like no other. Warm, soft, slick… he felt his head pop past the sphincter muscles and push deeper inside this beautiful man. Jesus fuck, this was… breathtaking. His thrust was steady, strong and deep and when he was fully enveloped inside Tom’s heat, Tom grasped Ben’s hip and held him in. 

Ben didn’t want to stop, but understood that Tom needed him to. Truth be told, Ben wanted to fuck him through the tile, but he waited for Ben to adjust to his cock. The heat of his body was almost overwhelming and he ached to move. He leaned in and pressed himself against Tom, nuzzling his face and scattering small, gentle kisses around his ear. Tom let out a deep moan at this and grinned, saying, “Move, Ben… slowly at first. Oh, that’s it, love… shit… This feels so fucking amazing… Oh God, more… more… mmmmmnnngh…”

Tom was past using actual words at this point -- and so was Ben. He was thrusting deep into Tom’s perfectly turned arse now, establishing a slow and steady rhythm that worked for both of them. Ben leaned back a bit, and watched with fascination how his cock disappeared inside of him so easily. Ben couldn’t believe how utterly beautiful it all was.

After a few minutes, it almost became too much to bear. “I want to cum, Tom,” said Ben, practically begging. “Can I cum inside you? Hm? Will you let me cum inside you?”

“Jesus, yes… oh dear God please… Just shift your angle a bit… there! Oh God…that’s it… that’s so fucking good!” panted Tom. Ben knew he was hitting Tom’s prostate every time now. The look of Tom against those tiles, the movement of his body with each push, the view of his hard throbbing cock moving in and out between Tom’s arse cheeks… it was all too much. Ben felt his testicles tighten, let out a shout of Tom’s name and came in hot powerful bursts that made his breath catch.

Ben collapsed on Tom’s back and held on to his shoulders, burying his face into the back of Tom’s neck. His breath heaved. He felt weak in the knees. It was the single most exhilarating orgasm of his entire life. All he could do was weakly mouth against Tom’s skin.

Ben was enjoying the afterglow when something suddenly woke him up. He asked, “Tom… did you cum?”

“Not yet, love,” Tom panted.

Ben raised his head and looked at him. “What?” he asked, humiliated that he didn’t notice, “Jesus, Tom. Why didn’t you say something? Tell me something?” He paused for a moment, nausea building in the pit of his stomach. How could he have been so selfish? Tom must think I’m rubbish at this. He felt his erection completely disappear and he pulled slowly out of Tom.

Needing time to think of what the hell to do, he turned away from Tom and took a moment to dispose of the condom. He turned back to find Tom leaning with his back against the tiles and slowly stroking his erection and watching him through half-lidded eyes.

“Because,” said Tom, his voice made sultry with desire, “now it’s your turn.” And he gave Ben a wicked grin.

Ben felt his mouth go dry.

“Let’s get out of this shower,” said Tom, turning off the tap, “The water’s gone cold and I’m freezing.” Tom stepped closer to Ben and ran his fingertips up and down Ben’s arms. He hovered his mouth close to Ben’s and whispered: “I think you can get me warm, though.” Tom licked Ben’s lips and watched him swoon at the touch. “You reckon?” he said.

This was going to be good.

~080~

The duvet offered some warmth, but it was the snogging that was really spreading heat around Tom’s body. Ben was atop him and Tom ran a fingertip down the curve of his spine, delighting in the gooseflesh that arose on Ben’s pale skin. To think that no one had ever… Oh my dearest Ben… this was going to be the best day of your young life.

Tom pressed kisses to Ben’s neck and slowly teased the hollow of his collarbone with the tip of his tongue. Slowly, he rolled him over, kissing down his length, teasing his nipples, flicking and licking and sucking them into full attention; he dipped his tongue in Ben’s navel and traced his fingertips around the ginger hair that topped his penis. Involuntary shivers moved along Ben’s abdomen… and he was starting to get hard again.

Feather-light kisses caused Ben’s cock to twitch and he couldn’t help but let out a soft ‘yes’ to every slight contact. Jesus… he was just beautiful. Tom took a moment to appreciate a thoroughly debauched scientist and cocked a half-grin at Ben’s heavy-lidded eyes. Tom traced licks and kisses down the insides of Ben’s thighs, creating a trail of them that created sparks in Ben’s cock. Tom nuzzled Ben’s scrotum with his nose and licked at the small patch of skin just underneath. Ben gasped at the contact and moaned even louder when Tom took one of his testicles in his mouth, feeling out its shape with his lips and increasing Ben’s pleasure with a low hum.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” exclaimed Ben, “Oh my God, Tom… please don’t stop… ah, yes… the other one now… shit…. Oh shit… your mouth feels… oh!”

Tom lubed up the fingers of one hand and made small circles around Ben’s opening with one fingertip. Ben trusted Tom so completely that he didn’t clench or get too nervous. He wanted this. He wanted Tom.

Tom released his scrotum and licked a stripe up the thick vein that ran the length of Ben’s cock. Ben arched his back and begged Tom not to stop. He was fully hard now and Tom positioned himself for what he had in mind. He got up on his knees, pulled Ben’s knees up, and slowly pressed a finger into Ben as he simultaneously sucked in the head of his cock. As the length of his finger entered, he made sure that he took in Ben’s cock all the more, until both his finger and Ben’s cock were buried in warm wetness that made Ben gasp and writhe slowly in his ecstasy.

Tom began to suck and finger-fuck in synch. The movements were slow of course, achingly so. Tom didn’t want Ben to have a bad first experience, but he also wanted him to experience a slow fuck -- which in Tom’s estimation, is the best kind of fuck there is.

Once he thought Ben could handle it, he inserted a second finger and sought out Ben’s prostate. The unintentional thrust of Ben’s hips nearly choked Tom and he pulled off Ben’s cock in surprise.

“Oh God,” said Ben, panicking that he’d hurt Tom, “I’m so sorry, mate. Jesus… are you alright?” Ben was humiliated. Christ, another faux pas. What the hell?

“Shhh…,” said Tom, smiling kindly, “It’s alright, mate. You just startled me is all. It’s fine. That was just your prostate. I’ll be more gentle this time. Alright?” To his credit, Tom didn’t lose his position inside of Ben; he still had two fingers inside of him and he slid them gently in and out, meaning to soothe more than pleasure. “Just relax now, love,” Tom said softly, “You’ve gone all tense. Shhhh…” And with that, he took Ben into his mouth again and began to suck gently at his head, licking around the corona and across his slit. Jesus… his precum tasted bitter and salty… Tom couldn’t get enough.

He fisted Ben’s shaft as he worked the head with his mouth, his other hand gently probing for the prostate once again.

“Ah… ah… shit there there theretherethere…,” said Ben. “Jesus… I can’t… I just… I…” Ben had no more words left. He lay back against the pillow and just allowed his senses to absorb all they could. The rapidity at which the sensory information came was breathtaking: here was pressure, heat, suction, wetness, tightness… all rolled up together, tumbling over one another vying for dominance and resulting in a mish-mosh of primal-instinct-inducing physical reaction. Ben keened, moaned, and ground his hips, clutching at the sheets, arching his back, and doing his best to hold back from mouth-fucking Tom.

He felt Tom pull off his dick and the cool air was like a slap across the face. Ben opened his eyes and gasped. Tom knelt between his legs. “Turn over, love,” Tom said, “All fours is best, I think.”

Ben did as he was told, just wanting to get off at this point. “Please let me come, Tom,” he whined, surprised that he sounded like a child begging for candy.

Ben didn’t see, but he guessed that Tom was smiling when he said, “Oh you are an eager one, aren’t you? Shhh… calm down now… I’ll take care of you, love. Don’t worry.”

Tom tossed the condom wrapper aside and lined up against Ben’s tight pink opening. Slowly, carefully, and by degrees, Tom slid into Ben’s heat, allowing him to adjust to his girth in increments.

Ben’s eyes shot open wide at the sensation. Fuck. Oh fuck. My God…. Oh Tom… I’m yours… all yours… shit.

Once Tom was balls-deep inside of him, he let Ben rest and relax. Ben looked back at him and said, “I’m all yours, you know. Always. Fucking always.” Ben reached back and gripped Tom’s hip, pulling him in even closer.

Tom leaned over him and kissed his spine right between his shoulder blades. “Mine, eh? You’re damn right you are. And I’m yours, my beautiful, fuckable Ben. Shall I move now? I need to cum so fucking badly.”

“Y-yes,” said Ben, fairly dying himself.

Tom’s strokes were slow at first. He wanted to give Ben that slow fuck he knew could be so amazing, but after a few minutes, his sense of urgency to cum took over and he began to thrust harder and harder, pounding his cock deeper and deeper into a very eager Ben. He reached around for Ben’s cock and stroked him as he fucked. The effect in Ben was no less than explosive. Both men came simultaneously, each crying out the other’s name during their release.

Nothing could have prepared Ben for this experience. It was beyond marvelous. To have someone who understood and cared for him guide him through the most tender, sweet, and fucking hot-as-hell lovemaking was the most precious thing. After cleaning themselves up a bit with their towels, they lay in Tom’s bed wrapped around each other, each man finding the other too completely comfortable to believe. This was what a relationship should be: peace, calm, support, and love.

~080~

 

James heard Ben talking to Tom upstairs, but didn’t disturb them. He came back downstairs to where Mike stood with a look of curiosity plastered on his face. “What happened?” he asked.

James shrugged his shoulders. “I have no idea how he beat us here, but Ben’s already talking with Tom,” said James.

“How’s it going?” asked Mike. “Well, do you think?”

“I have no idea,” said James, lightly irritated. “I didn’t eavesdrop, I just heard Ben’s and Tom’s voices and came back downstairs. If you want to be so fucking nosy, why don’t you go up and ask them?”

“Nah,” without a trace of sarcasm, he said, “they probably want to talk it out alone.”

James looked at Mike and shook his head. “Jesus, you pick a hell of a time to start being sensitive of other’s needs.”

“What?” said Mike. “Can’t a guy grow? Expand? Change, just a bit?” He walked past James and headed toward the cellar door. “You coming? You’re pretty filthy too, you know.”

James gave one last glance up the staircase. “Yeah,” he said and followed Mike into the cellar.

The cellar was meant mostly for storage and doing laundry and didn’t really have much more there. Boxes that belonged to the boys were somewhat clearly labeled and rested against the wall under the stairs propped up on empty crates all the way across the room from the washer and dryer. The empty crates were necessary. The boys learned that lesson the hard way after one of them (Mike) dumped an entire box of detergent in the wash – to get his clothes ‘extra clean’, he said. It took two weeks for their stuff to dry out.

Plank board shelves stretched along one wall and were installed in the laundry room by way of extra storage for spare linens, towels, flannels, and other items that didn’t need to be used every day. They also held the soap and fabric softeners the boys used.

There was ample space left for other things as well. Somehow through the course of a year, two six-foot stretches of plank wood became cluttered with the detritus of college life: extra plastic cups, a little hula girl with no head, three pairs of sunglasses, two ashtrays, two license tags from someone’s car, a roadworks sign that no one in the house took credit for nicking, and four small ceramic turtles. No one knows where the turtles came from. All this and more were held along those dusty shelves.

Almost in the center of the space there was a large heavy wooden dining table. It came with the house when they moved in. One day as three of them were folding their laundry on it, Ben thought to remark as to how the table got down in the space to begin with. It became a house mystery, until one night when, drunk out of their minds, Mike and James set about solving it. They picked it up and got it halfway up the stairs before they realized that it wasn’t going to fit. No matter which way they turned it, it wasn’t going to budge through. It was impossible.

“Fucking hell!” exclaimed Mike as they descended the stairs.

“What’s the matter?” said James.

“They took the fucking legs off,” he said.

“What?” said James, mystified at this non sequitur.

“The table,” he said, “They took the fucking legs off.”

“What are you on about?” said James.

“Oh, never mind,” said Mike. “It’s a good trick though.” He took off his shirt and threw it in the washer.

James finally caught on to what Mike was saying, remembering that night with a smile. “Jesus, we sure thought we had it figured, didn’t we?”

“What? That night? Yeah,” said Mike. “Bunch of drunk fucking geniuses, the pair of us.” They both laughed and regarded each other a moment.

“Aren’t you going to get your kit off?” said Mike, pointing at James’s soiled clothing.

“What?” said James, startled. He looked down. Dirt caked his clothing. There was a bit of blood too. Oh hell.

James stripped off his shoes, socks, shirt, and trousers and left his pants. He put all the clothes in the washer and started up the cycle. A pair of jeans landed in the washer as it filled with water. “What the hell are you doing?” said James. And then his heart stopped.

Mike stood naked before him, his pants in his hand.

“What?” said Mike, “I’m down to my last pair. I need to do some washing.” He walked slowly toward James who still stood by the machine gaping. Mike had the biggest prick… Jesus. “Besides, it’s part of my punishment, isn’t it?” he asked, leaning in low to growl the words into James’s ear. Mike looked practically predatory.

“You can’t do this,” said James, finally. His brain was about twenty seconds behind in this conversation.

“Can’t do what?” said Mike, innocently. “Wash my clothes?” He threw the pants into the washer, dropped the lid and sat on the machine.

“Jesus, mate,” said James, “have you no shame?”

“Not really,” said Mike with that wolfish grin playing on his lips. He reached for James. James pulled away from him and stepped back a few paces until his back was against the table. They watched each other for a moment: James the prey, Mike the hunter.

James couldn’t hide the effect a naked Mike had on him and put a hand over his growing erection. Mike scanned his eyes down to James’s crotch and gave him a sly grin. “See something you like, mate?” said Mike.

“Fuck off,” said James, blushing deeply.

“Oh fucking hell, James,” said Mike. He was suddenly losing his patience with this cat-and-mouse game they were playing. “If you want to talk about this, then let’s talk. Here. I’ll put on a towel.” He jumped off the machine and covered himself with a bath towel he retrieved from the shelf. “Better?” he asked.

“Yeah, thanks,” said James.

“So… what?” began Mike, as he leaned back against the washer, arms crossed. “This thing happened, and it was… nice. Different, but nice… and then you got scared—“

“I never did,” said James.

“Yes you did!” said Mike. “I saw the look in your eyes when you turned away from me. You knew I was up for more and you gave me this look like you couldn’t stand the sight of me and—“ Mike stopped talking when his voice cracked. Jesus, did he really care that much about what James thought of him? What the fucking hell?

“Alright, mate?” said James, softly.

“Yeah,” said Mike, shaking it off, “I’m fine.” After a moment he said: “So…. What do you want to talk about, then? How much you hate my guts? How weird this whole fucking thing is?” James didn’t speak. He just let Mike get it all out of his system. The silence was making Mike decidedly uncomfortable. “What do you want from me: a confession of love, or something?” he asked. “Do you want me to tell you that I can’t fucking get that kiss out of my head? That all I want to do is kiss you again?”

James saw the despair in Mike’s eyes. James could see how lost he was in all this. James couldn’t help himself. He reacted.

Moving forward quickly, he grabbed Mike’s face and covered his mouth with a kiss. It was wet and sloppy at first, each man fighting for dominance: James because he was trying to comfort, Mike because that’s just the way he was. But then, Mike relented. He was tired of fighting all the damn time. This was nothing he could control. He let James lead and was never more grateful to do so.

James had the softest mouth, softer than Tom’s. His lips were plump and suckable, his tongue was hot and slick against Mike’s. Mike thought he was going to lose his mind. Fucking hell… What… Oh God… more… shit. Give me more.

Mike snaked his muscular arms around James and held him tightly, the skin-to-skin contact opening up new avenues of sensation that neither man was prepared for. Here was heat, strength, power, and lust.

All James wanted to do was to taste every part of Mike’s skin. He carded his hands through Mike’s hair, enjoying the feel of it, the novelty of being this close to him. As Mike held him close, his hands traveled down Mike’s neck and across his shoulders. James had always admired Mike’s shoulders, the power they contained, the pantherish way he would roll them subconsciously whenever he walked…damn… I want this man… Jesus Christ… I have to have him.

James lost all control. His tongue probed deeper in Mike’s mouth until he was fairly tongue-fucking him. His hands smoothed over every part of Mike’s skin he could reasonably touch, including down his chest and across his nipples which were hard as rocks. He pinched one and felt Mike jump and moan. Heat shot straight to James’s groin with that. Holy God… I want to make him do that again… 

James reached lower to the towel. Mike’s erection was unmistakable as it burrowed into James’s thigh. When James loosened the cloth and let it drop, Mike’s dick was so hard it held the damn thing up. James broke the kiss and looked at Mike with wonder; he suddenly felt really inadequate compared to Mike’s raging hard on. Mike shrugged and smiled, removing the towel completely. He leaned in to kiss James again.

Mike slid his hands underneath James’s pants and across his arse. Those huge hot hands felt so damn good on his skin, James grunted and licked Mike’s lips. Mike hitched James’s pelvis toward his own and as their cocks came into contact through the thin cloth of James’s pants, any thoughts of inadequacy on James’s part disappeared. All he knew was that he wanted this man. Just him. Only you, Mike… Jesus… only you…. Damn it.

Mike worked James’s pants off his body and James stepped out of them. James or Mike had ever been naked with another man before. Not like this. This was a milestone for both of them, something which even the cavalier Michael Fassbender couldn’t take for granted. He looked into James’s eyes as James told him: “This-- we do this… and there’s no going back. It is what it is for us. Understand?”

Mike nodded, a thousand thoughts spinning in his mind. “Does this mean we’re gay now?”

James smiled. “Let’s not put a label on it,” he said. “All I know is that I really want to be with you. You’re my best mate, Mike. You’re always the one hanging around, cheering me up… or making me so fucking angry I could punch you. Either way, I don’t want anyone else. Just you.” He paused and asked: “Is that okay?”

Mike had a strange look in his eyes. It was sort of frightening to see, but James held his gaze steady. “It’s okay,” Mike said finally. He kissed James softly on the lips. “When I first kissed you and I thought you hated my guts because of it, I thought I’d lost you. You know, as a mate. It really… hurt. I didn’t know it would hurt. I guess that means that I want you too. Only you. My best mate. Is that alright with you?”

James smiled. “So I’m not going to be just another fuck, then?” he said and added quickly: “Because that’s just what I thought I would be to you. And I never want that. Ever.”

“Not happening, tosser,” said Mike. “I don’t know how you did it, but all of a sudden, you’re my whole fucking world. I wouldn’t break your heart for anything.” He leaned in and kissed James softly, slowly and with such tenderness it even surprised Mike.

The kiss they shared awakened their passions anew and whatever flagging their erections had done in the interim had completely disappeared. Mike grabbed both of their cocks and stroked them together. Both men gasped.

“How the fuck did you know to do that?” asked James.

“I don’t know,” panted Mike, “It just seemed like a good idea.” He began to pump both of their cocks together.

“Fucking… brilliant….oh shit…,” gasped James. “God, Mike…”

Mike thought he was going to cum at the sound of James moaning his name. He wasn’t kidding that this was amazing. The pressure, the heat, the fact that precum was soaking his hand and making everything slicker, and the way they were both fucking his fist… holy mother of God.

James licked and sucked at Mike’s chest, focusing his attention on one of his nipples. Mike threw his head back at the contact. “James,” he sighed. “Oh Jesus, James… yes…”

James couldn’t believe any of this was actually happening. It was all too good to be true. And what the hell? Fucking Mike in the laundry room? This day was becoming seriously surreal.

Mike let go of their cocks suddenly and said, “Get on the table.”

“Wha—What for?” said James, clearly upset at the loss of contact.

“Two reasons,” said Mike. “First, because if I kept on wanking us, I would have cum all over you right then and that’s not how I want this to end.” Mike took down three towels from the shelf, spread two of them out on the table top, one on top of the other and folded the last up as a makeshift pillow. James looked at him utterly fascinated “And two…,” here, Mike turned to James and motioned for him to sit down on the head of the table, “…I’ve been told many times that in order to appreciate something, you have to do it yourself.”

“What the hell are you thinking of doing?” said James.

“Push back a bit and lie down,” said Mike. James did as he was told. “Trust me, mate,” said Mike. “I hope you’ll like this. I have no idea if I will or not.”

He placed his head between James’s thighs and deep-throated his cock in one go.

“Holy motherFUCK!” said James. Mike pulled off of James’s dick slowly, his cheeks hollowed out from the suction. He came off his prick with a wet pop.

“Not bad,” said Mike almost to himself. He looked at James. “Want more?”

“Fuck yes!” said James, barely believing his eyes. Mike was actually sucking his dick. And he liked it. Son of a bitch.

Mike filled his mouth with James’s cock once more, this time concentrating not on how much he could take in of the man, but how good he could make him feel. He ran his tongue over his slit and tasted his precum. Salty and bitter… that was new. Not unpleasant, just… different. Jesus, fucking was going to be really different from now on, wasn’t it?

He let his tongue play on the inside rim of his foreskin, his frenulum, his shaft. He tried to remember all the things that he loved about getting his dick sucked. He massaged James’s testicles with one hand and James moaned his pleasure. Heat spread to Mike’s already dripping cock. Fuck… that was beautiful.

Mike liked sucking James’s cock. It only helped that it was as if Mike’s mouth was made for sucking dick. His tongue, teeth and lips teased every moan they could from James. He paced his breathing, varying between suction and humming. Everything seemed to fall into Mike’s natural instinct. And it didn’t hurt that James tasted so fucking good.

James carded his hands through Mike’s hair lightly, not placing any pressure on his head, but oh Jesus… the urge to mouth fuck that man was overwhelming. He tried his best not to thrust his hips too much either. He didn’t want to do anything that would put Mike off sucking dick. Oh sweet Jesus… his suction was perfect… and the humming! James laid his head back on the makeshift pillow and immersed himself in the sensation.

After a while, James’s hips thrust involuntarily and he looked down to see if it upset or hurt Mike, but it was as if Mike failed to notice. He just moaned around James’s dick as though it were the best thing to happen to him. James realized that Mike probably had no gag reflex. Damn… Thank you, Jesus and all the fucking saints.

“Mike,” James said, “I’m close…. So fucking close, mate. What do you want to do?”

Mike pulled off his cock to answer and once again, the loss of heat was enough to make James whimper. Mike pulled at the base of James’s cock to stave off his orgasm and said, “Easy, James. Let me just get something.” Mike went to the shelves and started digging in a small basket for something. He came back with lube and condoms.

“What the hell? Why do we have lube and condoms in our laundry?” said James.

“Oh please,” said Mike. “I used to be a scout. You know, ‘Be prepared’.”

“Be prepared for having gay sex in the laundry?” said James, still lost.

Mike laughed. “No, you twat,” he said, “You think you’re the only one that’s gotten fucked in this room? Better safe than sorry, I say. And besides, nothing ruins the mood more than having to break for more than a few seconds to grab… necessities. Here.” Mike slipped a condom on James’s hardness and James hissed at the touch.

Mike climbed up on the table with James, his legs straddling James’s hips. He leaned over and kissed James passionately. James tasted Mike and a bitterness that had to be his own precum. The realization of it sent more heat to his already throbbing cock.

“Jesus, Mike,” said James. “I need to cum. I really fucking need to cum.”

“Me too, mate,” said Mike. He reached for the lube and held it up for James. “But if memory serves, you’ve got to use this before you cum inside me.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” said James. “You want me to…? Inside you? Up your?”

Mike grinned. “I trust no other,” he said. Suddenly his smile disappeared and his eyes displayed something fragile inside himself. “I actually do want this, James.” He kissed him softly. “Please. I want to feel you inside me. You tasted so good. Please.”

James ran his hands soothingly up and down Mike’s sides. He had never seen Mike look so vulnerable. He leaned up and kissed his face, nuzzling his nose against Mike’s cheek. “I love you,” said James.

Mike looked as though he were about to weep. James’s words hit him like a lorry. Is that what this is? Is that what has made him do all the stupid shit he’s done with James-- to James-- all this time? Mike gazed into James’s eyes and saw the raw truth of his words. Instantly, all the cockiness and bravado were gone. Mike was just… Mike. “I love you too, James,” he said. “So fucking much.”

This kiss was like none before. Slow and giving, tender and loving, the two men connected on a level that neither of them imagined possible. It was everything they wanted it to be, and it was everything that they never realized that they needed. On the break, they breathed each other’s breath for a moment and memorized each other’s faces.

Mike gave James the sweetest smile he’d ever seen and moved off of him to present himself on all fours for James, effectively taking James’s place on the table. Mike’s arse in the air, James admired the view. Mike’s body made a beautiful picture. He was like a fucking model.

James coated his fingers in the lube, tentatively placed a finger at Mike’s opening, and pressed in. Mike hissed at the pressure and James backed off instantly.

“Sorry, Mike,” he said, “Jesus, are you alright?”

“No!” said Mike, almost at the same moment, “It’s fine. It’s fine. Just keep going. That sound was a good sound. I’ll let you know if you hurt me. Go on.”

James began again, slowly probing a finger in. He could feel Mike relax and let his finger through and his neglected cock twitched with anticipation. Mike was so… hot inside. The slickness of the lube and the heat from his arse drove James to begin slowly licking and kissing Mike’s arse cheeks. When his tongue danced along the base of his spine, Mike let out a moan of James’s name and James realized that Mike’s hips were thrusting as if to impale himself on James’s finger. Shit… Bloody hell…

James tried a second finger and as with the first, Mike let out a hiss and James held still, waiting for him to adjust. Should I go for a third? Best to have him loose, rather than too tight, I suppose. But Jesus fuck, this is so hot. God, I want this man.

James began to idly stroke his own cock in the same slow rhythm with which he was finger-fucking Mike. He couldn’t wait to fuck him through this table. Damn.

He added a third finger and waited again for Mike’s hips to start moving. When Mike moved, James stroked himself, keeping time as closely as he could, enjoying the sight and the sensation. He licked a stripe across Mike’s tailbone, and watched as the man thrust, twitched and moaned at the sudden feeling. James could get lost in this. He could cum from this alone.

“I think I’m ready for you, love,” said Mike. The term of endearment was strange to James’s ear, but his heart thrilled at it. He removed his fingers, lubed up the condom and tried to line himself up, but he didn’t have the height. He tried balancing on one knee and one foot, but that just hurt his knee. There was no way.

Mike saw the problem. “Here. Get down here,” he said. He made James lie as he was before, on his back with the towel acting as a pillow. Mike then straddled James and taking a hold of his poor throbbing prick, sat down on his dick slowly.

It all happened so quickly that all James could do was gasp for air as he saw his cock slowly, achingly disappear into Mike. Mike’s breath was coming in gasps by the time he finally was fully sitting on James’s cock.

The sensation was almost overwhelming for both men. James was amazed at the difference in sensation. It was like fucking the tightest pussy ever. He could feel himself against every surface and the heat…. Son of a bitch… the heat of it was… well… he didn’t have words. He couldn’t wait for Mike to move. He wanted to fuck him so badly. He wanted to watch him cum. He wanted Mike to see him cum inside him. Move, damn you… oh yes… that’s it… just a bit more… so good…. Oh that’s right… just like that—ah! Shit!

As Mike sat there, adjusting to James’s girth, the pressure of that hard prick inside of him was breathtaking. He wanted to move. He ached to impale himself on this beautiful man. He wanted to pump his fist on his dick and cover him in cum, claiming him as his own. As these thoughts passed through his head, Mike realized that he had already begun to grind against James. He became more and more bold in his movements until he was fucking himself on James’s entire length in slow, steady strokes that were building up delicious pressure. So good… so fucking good… shit…oh shit… Yes… I need this… I need you, James… so fucking good… Oh Christ!

“God, I want to cum all over you, James… Would you like that?” Mike panted.

“Oh shit,” said James, “Yes, Mike… God yes… oh fuck… oh fuck…Cum for me. Cum for me now!”

Mike pumped them together faster and faster, the skin slapping between them, the slickness of the lube creating obscene sounds. Mike made a few pulls on his huge cock while he watched James watch him…and that’s all it took for both of them.

Mike shot thick ropes of cum all over James’s chest breathing James’s name over and over. James gripped Mike’s hips hard enough to bruise as he pounded up into that fucking sex god, releasing his seed with a cry.

Mike pulled himself off of James and lay down by his side, curled into him. James shivered and Mike lifted up his head. He shot James a curious look, still too far gone to speak any language and understood what to do. He reached up carefully and took the towel from beneath James’s head slowly. He unfolded it and spread it out across their lower halves. It didn’t cover much, but what it did cover, was warm almost instantly. James turned toward Mike and they both looked at each other. Nothing needed to be said. This was it. This was all they would ever need.

James reached up and touched Mike’s face. “Thank you,” was all he managed before falling into a light doze, a small smile on his face.

Mike watched him sleep for a minute, his own eyelids getting heavy. He kissed James’s forehead gently and whispered, “Thank you, my James,” before letting sleep take him.

 

~080~

An hour on a hard table in a cold laundry room will cause anyone to wake up in pain, life-changing sex or no life-changing sex.

“Oof…,” said Mike. His ribs were reminding him that they were still on the mend. “Shit.”

“Mmnnnnnggg…” said James. The towel had slipped and they were both exposed. James was visibly shivering and couldn’t stop.

Mike was concerned and wrapped James up in the towels they had used. One of them had cum stains and Mike noticed that James had let his cum dry on his skin. Well… that’s alright. They both were due for showers anyway. And now they could take them together. A tired, happy, and wicked grin found a place on Mike’s face at the thought. He ushered James up the stairs and toward the upstairs toilet.

On the way, they passed Tom’s bedroom. His door was open and James did a double take as he passed by. Ben and Tom were entwined in bed, Tom resting on Ben’s chest, Ben stroking through Tom’s curls idly. They were speaking so low James couldn’t tell what they were saying, but Ben interspersed his dialogue with small kisses that he would place on Tom’s head. Tom caught James’s eye and winked at him.

“What goes on here, then?” said Mike. Honestly, the man had all the tact of a bull in a china shop.

“What does it look like?” said Ben, mock-defensively, “Haven’t you seen two well-shagged blokes before?”

All four of them laughed out loud.

Mike turned James toward him, looked at the two in the bed and said, “Well… as a matter of fact…,” and kissed James deeply.

Tom grinned from ear to ear. Ben’s jaw dropped. Ben turned to Tom: “What the—?“

“Shhh…,” whispered Tom, placing a finger over Ben’s amazing mouth, “I’ll explain later.”

As soon as the kiss broke, James grinned and blushed, looking sheepishly in Tom’s direction and knowing what expression he would see on his face before he saw it. Tom and James exchanged a look of complete understanding. It seemed to say: ‘This was as it should be. Good on you.’

“Right then,” said Mike to James, “Shower, I think, yeah?”

“Right,” said James. He nodded his head at Ben and Tom and went across the hall.

Mike looked to see James was gone and whispered to Tom and Ben: “You know that whole thing with hitting the prostate during anal and how good it’s supposed to be?” The two men looked at each other with bemused expressions. They nodded at Mike.

Mike mouthed the words silently to them as he shut the door: “Oh… my….GOD.”


End file.
